The First Strike (Zugzwang Redeux)
by lilgizzy1983
Summary: "JJ puts her hand up to his through the window, lets out a deep breath, and holds up the side of the note that says "ZUGZWANG". As she pulls her hand away from the window, there is a light white residue of powder from her fingers." This is a Replicator rewrite. What I think could have happened at the end of Season 8. Multi Chap, M for language, some violence.
1. Chapter 1

"THE FIRST STRIKE"

GARCIA picking up ringing cell phone in her office:

Garcia: "Hey Cupcake, what's up? Are you not already here? GASP! She's not early ONE TIME!"

JJ on other line walking out her front door:

JJ: "OK Garcia, I see what you did there **(**laughs to herself)No but seriously, Henry decided at the last minute that his shirt was not the same color as Daddy's shirt and had a 5 year old moment."

JJ opens passenger door and sits throwing her purse in the back and closing door while still talking.

Garcia: "Well he IS five sweety."

JJ: "Yeah, well either way, I'm late! They're on their way out to the car now. I'll be there in 15 minutes."

Garcia: "Still jealous of your proximity to the office."

JJ: "House for sale right down the street…just sayin'."

Garcia: "See you soon lovebug."

JJ hangs up, glances back at WILL and HENRY walking out the front door and reaches over to start the car for Will. As it turns over, the air conditioning starts full blast, momentarily blowing a soft, white powder into the car through the vents. JJ startled quickly looks down at the trace of powder on her clothes and hands and notices a piece of paper on the floor. As she picks the card up, she sees it's some sort of stationary. Typed out on the front is:

"JENNIFER, WILLIAM, AND HENRY"

She flips over the card in a tamed panic.

"ZUGZWANG"

As JJ instantly puts together the situation, she whips back to see Will carrying Henry and reaching for the back car door handle. Thinking fast she immediately hits the door locks, locking herself in the contaminated vehicle, and locking the people she cares about most out, safely.

Will: laughing "Cher, seriously? Come on we're la.."

He stops mid-scolding as he looks at her face for the first time. She had a tell tale "panic mode" face that he knew all too well. Her big blues eyes, wide and staring straight into his. Tears watering in them, but they barely ever actually fall. He's only actually seen her cry maybe 3 times in the almost 7 years they've been together. For some reason when he looked at her today, he knew he would see it again, she was on the verge of something. He didn't know what it was or why.

Will: "JJ what's goin' on, talk to me…" he said calmly but loudly through the window glass.

He touched his hand to the glass on the outside in an effort to get her to do the same. He felt like he needed to make her feel closer to him…to comfort her.

JJ puts her hand up to his through the window, lets out a deep breath she didn't know she'd been holding, and holds up the side of the note that says "ZUGZWANG". As she pulls her hand away from the window, there is a light white residue of powder from her fingers.

Will stares into her eyes, she can't figure out what he was feeling, it was a toss up between rage, understanding, and blind fear. He stood up and said simply:

Will: "What do we do?"

JJ holds up her cell phone and hits the speed dial, while yelling to Will:

JJ: "Get him inside! Don't touch ANYTHING!"


	2. Chapter 2

IN THE BAU:

HOTCH answers his ringing cell phone as he steps out of his office on his way to the bullpen. Garcia is heading through the room over to him cheerfully.

Hotch: "Hey JJ..why.."

JJ: "HOTCH. He got to us."

He can hear the difference in her tone, it was the same tone she used when she was urging him to go into the bank after Will was shot last year. Urgent and fearful, but hushed, like she was forcing a calmness that seemed impossible.

Garcia is closing in on Hotch to explain that JJ will be late when she sees his face. She knows to be concerned when he doesn't look straight at you.

Hotch: "What happened." In the calmest and most unaffected, official voice he can muster for JJ's sake.

JJ taking a another deep breath, in her muted tone: "The Replicator. 2009, Quail Hills Park. I'm locked in my car with a 'ZUGZWANG' note and an unknown white powdery substance."

It came out almost robotically. She took a shaky breath after telling him what happened. It made it real. He heard it loud and clear.

Hotch: "We'll be there in less than 20 minutes. Hold tight, do you hear me…we're coming"

JJ: "Got it boss. Hurry please? And Aaron, bring Garcia."

Hotch: "You got it"

By this time he was almost running into the bullpen with Garcia hot on his heels asking questions:

Garcia: "Sir, JJ's going to be late, what was that call, what happened? Are you guys going on a case with out her? HOTCH!?"

At that he stops at the edge of the bullpen, she almost runs into him.

Garcia: "Hotch! Answers! Use your words. WHAT'S GOING ON?!"

She could see he was almost in a panic, but stifling it to keep his famous control. She could always tell in his face when something horrible was about to happen. Garcia started to cry, even though she didn't know why.

Hotch: "Everybody in the car NOW! (turning to face PG) Garcia, you're with me."

Morgan: "Aren't we waiting for JJ?"

Reid: "Where are we going? Do we have a case?"

They all asked already on their way into the elevator.

Hotch: "I'll explain on the way, Alex, you're gonna grab one of the cars and head straight to the Pentagon. I'll call ahead to tell them you're on your way. You're looking for General Lee Whitworth. Reid, call Dr. Linda Kimura and tell her we need a team ASAP over to JJ's."

At that he paused looking at the elevator floor numbers passing by, staring with what seemed to be great concentration.

The rest of the team just looked at him with various reactions. Only Reid, Morgan and David remembered who those specific people were in connection to the situation with JJ. Garcia was crying quietly confused but now certain JJ was in deep serious trouble, and Alex completely in the dark, only knowing JJ wasn't there and apparently in some sort of danger.

Reid: "Anthrax?"

Hotch: "Probably"

Morgan: "Will and Henry?"

Hotch: "Safe for now in think. She said she locked herself in the car with the substance. Garcia, you remember the Anthrax case? Can you call Will to explain? I'm not sure what JJ has told him, if anything at all."

She just nods, staring blankly.

By this time they were walking towards, and piling into the respective SUVs. Reid pulls out his phone and dials Dr. Kimura.

Garcia pulls out her cell and speed dials JJ's house line.

Will: "Penelope! What's happening!?"

Garcia: "Will! We're on our way over, the whole team. We'll be there soon, we need you to just stay calm and keep my munchkin safe for his Mama ok?"

Will: "I'm on top of that, but I can do a better job if I know what the hell is happenin' with my wife."

Garcia: "Umm, ok, so back when Henry was a baby, we had this case…Anthrax."

Will: "WHAT? When did…what do you…"

Garcia: "I know, shh honey I know. Lemme explain, OK so some crazy dude decided to release a resistant, fast acting strain of Anthrax into a populated park. 15 people died and later in the case Reid was exposed. Everybody had a hard time with it because it was FULL media blackout. No one could say a thing, total lockdown."

Will: "And…? What happened…"

Garcia: "Well, they caught the guy and were able to make up an antitoxin quickly enough for Reid and a couple others. But Will, this case rattled JJ, bad. All she wanted to do was call you and tell you not to leave the house with Henry, but she strictly wasn't allowed. I'm actually surprised that she didn't, because when I talked to her it seemed like she had cracked and didn't really care about protocall."

Hotch spoke startling Garcia: "She did"

Garcia: "What?"

Will: "What?"

Garcia: "Hold on Will let me put you on speaker. What do you mean Hotch?"

Hotch: "She did call home, everyone's phones were tapped for security during the media blackout. I never called her out on it because she got the answering machine and didn't say anything that would compromise security. I never told her I knew."

Garcia: "Oh my God, if she did call, it's on record somewhere…which means somebody SOMEWHERE knew she was rattled by the case enough to ignore protocol!"

David from back: "Hotch that means this is an inside job! The Replicator works WITH us, or at least has access to all of our government files!"

Morgan: "That must be how he got a hold of the Anthrax! He either HAS the security to sensitive areas of the Pentagon, or is good enough on the computer to fake clearance for himself and bypass security!"

Garcia: "Will, all that matters right now is that you guys are safely out of harms way and that we are working fast to get her out of there and get her what she needs to make it through this alright?...We'll be there soon and I'll check on her."

Reid speaks up: "Dr. Kimura is 1 hour out. She says she assumes by then JJ will have definitely started showing symptoms, and depending on the amount she was exposed to…they might even be getting pretty bad by then. She also said the Pentagon has the antitoxin, but as before, we don't know what strain this is. Honestly, do we even know if it's Anthrax?"

Hotch: "The only information we have is what JJ gave us. We'll know more when we get there. But at least this gives us a major clue about our UNSUB. Dave, call the CDC and let them know what's going on, we'll need all the help we can get."

CMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCM

JJ sat quietly, staring out the windshield, waiting for the Calvary. She kept looking at the time on her cell phone. She called Hotch 8 minutes ago. It had been 10 minutes since she was exposed. Still feeling fine she couldn't do anything but stare, with tears in her eyes still…not quite falling but just sitting there. She couldn't breakdown yet, she didn't want to scare Garcia. That is why she asked Hotch to bring her, she knew if Garcia was there she would be crying and emotional, helping JJ keep up her Mama Bear, strong, emotionless façade. She just had to hold it together until they got here. Looking at her phone again. 9 minutes since she had called Hotch.

JJ looked down at her hands and suit, she had just the slightest white coating still visible. She found an old shirt of Henry's in the back seat earlier and had wiped her face and brushed off most of the powder, but some of it still remained. All she could think of was stripping the contaminated clothes off and getting a shower, or sprayed down by a hose, A FIREHOSE even. Just washing off the poison from her body. She didn't care who saw her naked, she didn't care if she was cold, or exposed, she just wanted this shit OFF. 11 minutes since she had called Hotch.

Will and Henry had stayed inside, it was bittersweet for her, knowing they were safer in there, but wishing she had the strong reassurance that merely seeing Will would bring her. She had to keep it together. Taking another deep, shaky breath, she sneezed.

JJ: "Damn."


	3. Chapter 3

CHAPTER 3

The ambulance arrived first on the scene. Dave had called them from the parking garage earlier.

This did nothing to calm JJ's fraying nerves. Especially considering the EMTs weren't even getting out of the vehicle. She assumed they had strict orders to be on standby until some official told them they could move in on her later. That instantly made her think about "later" again, what condition would she be in by the time they were able to reach her? Would they even be able to help? Was this even Anthrax? Would they have an antitoxin for the strain she was infected with? What if they couldn't get it to her in time, she will have inhaled an awful lot of the stuff by then?

At 8:23, exactly 18 minutes after she had called Hotch, she saw the black SUV from down the street moving at a ridiculous speed over to her location. Her heart skipped a couple of beats and she let just a couple of the tears she had been saving fall. 'Out of relief' she told herself. 'Relief ONLY'. She had to be strong today, not like the last time, not like while they were on the case and she had called home. She always told herself she did what she had to do, damn the consequences. To her surprise there hadn't been any. She's not stupid, she knows there is no way she could've made that kind of call, during that kind of lockdown without someone notifying Hotch. She was just thankful that her boss pretended it never happened, probably because she never got a hold of Will.

By the time she realized she had gotten lost in her thoughts and had been staring off again, she heard a bang on the window, it was Hotch. It startled her and she gasped. In doing so it forced a few coughs, not quite a fit, but not insignificant either. By the time she said Hotch's name she realized her throat was already scratchy.

JJ: "Hotch...How's it goin'?" She forced a sarcastic smile. 'Here we go' she thought to herself. The beginning of the biggest fake out of her life. She could do this.

Hotch: "JJ! How are you feeling?"

JJ: "Been better. OK for now." She gave him a thumbs up and forced a crooked half smile.

They each spoke loudly through the window glass.

EARLIER, IN THE SUV

Garcia: "How much longer til we get to my girl?"

Hotch: "Maybe 2 minutes out, we're right around the corner, we'll get to her Garcia, she'll be alright." he said with his calm, monotone exterior.

Morgan: "Yeah Baby Girl. The Pennsylvania Petite can handle more than this, I've seen her take down some guy twice her size!"

Reid: "Yeah but UNSUBs she can fight, this she just has to sit there and kind of…get sick progressively and wait. Who knows how JJ will deal with that. If she panics it could make her condition worse. Statistically, 84% of all Inhalant Anthrax victims…"

Dave: "Kid!" He scolded to shut him up "Listen guys, I've only ever seen that girl panic once, and it wasn't in concern for her OWN well being. She can deal with whatever comes her way in the moment as long as her family is safe. Afterwards, on the other hand, we'll probably have to give her some space so she can process."

Hotch: "There's the car."

They had been speeding ridiculously the entire trip, and once Hotch saw the car he just went faster. The ambulance was parked on the street near her vehicle but the EMTs were still inside, as instructed. He knew she'd been going half crazy sitting alone, knowing Will and Henry were right inside and they were down the street.

As they pulled to a stop the wheels screeched. They wound up almost on her sidewalk, Hotch was not worried about parking etiquette.

They all hopped out, he was the first to her window, at first glance he noticed her forehead and face were sweaty and kind of pale. She was staring at her hands in almost a daze, or daydream. He knocked on the window and she jolted her head up to look at him and gasped, letting out a number of coughs. He knew right then that this was definitely Anthrax, but didn't let his expression change.

JJ: "Hotch!" she said in a raspier voice that normal.

Hotch: "JJ! How are you feeling?" But he already knew the answer.

JJ: "Been better, OK for now."

He could tell she had immediately put on a strong front. That was how she was going to cope, he thought. He would let her for now. Hotch knew he'd have to probe her later, after the crisis was over. Hopefully he'd get a chance.

No longer than it took JJ to answer, Garcia and Reid were at his sides pushing Hotch away.

Garcia: "Sugar Plum, are you ok? What happened? Don't worry we're all over this like Chocolate Thunder on me after a few drinks!"

JJ couldn't help but smile. As she ran her hand through her hair she realized she was sweating. Which means the team must've noticed as well. She almost got embarrassed but then realized she didn't really care. She just wanted to get out of there.

JJ: "I'm alright Pen, holding steady, no worries ok. Now, what's my ETA on getting out of this?" as she let out a slight cough.

Garcia: "Not sure yet, the Dr. that treated Reid, will be here in about 40-45 minutes. The CDC is coming as well, probably to set up one of those crazy tent things so they can get you out of the car."

Reid: "There going to hose you down. It's only fun if you enjoy being naked in public."

JJ: "Well you know me." She sniffs.

Reid: "What do you need from us?"

JJ: "Well I need Garcia to stay here and tell me about her trolls or something, and I need you to go inside and explain everything to Will."

Garcia: "I already gave him the Cliffsnotes version in the car, but Reid can give him the details, play with Henry, make sure they are safe."

What she meant was, 'Make sure they don't start showing symptoms as well.'

JJ noticed the wording and Garcia's facial expression. She is a profiler after all.

JJ: "Reid I want updates every ten minutes on my boys." She said while knocking on the inside of the window and pointing at him. If she threatened him, she knew he'd do it.

Reid nodded in a solemn understanding. Garcia just stared at them wondering what between the lines dialogue she was missing. 'I hate working with profilers'.

In the meantime, Morgan and Rossi were over at the ambulance giving them more instruction and telling them about what to expect. 'Coughing, fever, sweating, respiratory distress at varying degrees, aphasia, confusion…'. When they were done, they walked back around to the car, looking at each other with a fearful understanding before stepping forward to the window to see JJ.

Morgan: "Heyyy Mama. How do you like bein' in the car?"

JJ: smiles "It's awesome, outside is overrated anyway" sniffs. As she wipes her nose with a tissue from her purse. Everyone looks at each other concerned.

JJ notices immediately and can only force another smile, if she's giving them a hard time then she's not crying or falling apart in front of them. She knew they'd see right through it, but she's dealing with it the only way she can right now.

JJ: "Alright guys, well what do you expect? Did you think it was powdered sugar? I'll be alright as soon as the CDC gets here and that Dr. whatever her name is gets me the antidote thing."

Seeing she clearly wanted to keep it light, Garcia was crying but smiling at her.

Garcia: "Wouldn't it have been nice if it was powdered sugar though? My Sugar Muffin all covered in sugar. Will would have a ball!"

JJ straight up laughed at this, as did Morgan. Dave just raised an eyebrow at the immaturity and excused himself from the 'kids table' to go see what Hotch was doing. He wasn't there to see what the others saw, which was when JJ had to immediately stop laughing to go into a slight coughing fit. Garcia put her hand on the window as a substitute for being able to hold her friend's hand. JJ noticed this while she was coughing and did the same. Morgan squeezed Garcia's other hand, shot her a look that said 'Let us know if anything changes', then walked over to join Hotch and Rossi.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N;: Just a couple things! I am overwhelmed by the followers and reviews! thanks! This is clearly my first fic lol. Love you guys! I do have two confessions... 1. I actually wrote and completed this story last year before the Season 8 finale soooo whatever happens happens, I sincerely apologize if anybody doesn't like it. 2. This one is for reviewer "mkg", you called it, I was actually a Radio/TV/Film major, so I have more of a screenplay writing style. I've already gotten yelled at for it by people I know who are creative writers. I might try to write normal one day but for know this is more my comfort zone. THANKS! ENJOY!

CHAPTER 4

As Rossi walks over to Hotch, who is standing on the lawn on the phone, Hotch hangs up and turns to face him.

Hotch: "Hey, how's she doing?"

Rossi: "They may as well be 15 years old over there. No, really, she's hanging in there, clearly using humor as her defense mechanism. Her facial expressions have her leaning more towards an inward panic, but she seems to know that she needs to keep it suppressed for the time being."

Hotch: "Good, the better her spirits are, fake or otherwise, the less stress on her body and the longer she has until this thing gets bad."

Morgan, walking over quickly: "Hey guys, what did we find out? She's going downhill pretty fast. We need to get her outta there quick."

Rossi: "What happened? She was laughing when I left."

Morgan: "Yeah, until she was thrown into a coughing fit, I don't even know if it's over yet, Garcia is there with her keeping her grounded, but I don't know how much longer either of them can last without freaking out."

Hotch: "It doesn't help that she's in such an enclosed space, that won't help her stamina, physically or emotionally. I just got off with the CDC, they'll be here any minute to start working on getting her out and decontaminated for treatment. Dr. Kimura will be here in about 5 minutes as well. Alex got to the Pentagon a little while ago, her and the General are trying to secure release of the antitoxin as soon as possible. They'll send a team to wherever JJ is at the time."

Reid walks out of the house, with Henry and carries him over to Hotch.

Reid: "Hey, do you think it's safe enough for him to go over there to see his Mama, Boss?"

Hotch: "I don't know, it might put more stress on her to see him so close to the car. I'll check, stay inside and I'll come get you when she's ready. And I want to check with Dr. Kimura first to make sure there's no danger. Putting ourselves in harm's way is one thing, but the last thing JJ would want is something happening to Henry because we were careless."

Reid: "Right, got it. I'll let Will know, could you tell JJ they are fine…and symptom-free? How is she?"

Morgan: "Not symptom-free."

Reid nods curtly and walks back into the house with Henry.

A few minutes later, the others walk over to the car to see if JJ was feeling better after the coughing fit.

Morgan: "Hey Girl, how's our mama doin'?"

Garcia just looked up at them with a sympatheic, yet worried look.

They looked into the car as JJ still had her hand held up to where Garcia's was, she looked paler, and sweatier after the coughing, and had her eyes closed pinching the bridge of her nose, this was her classic headache tell.

When she opened her eyes to the sound of talking outside the window, her eyes took a couple seconds to focus and were noticeably bloodshot. As she opened her eyes she moved her hand from her nose to her chest.

Garcia to the boys: "When I asked her if she was alright after her coughing situation, she said her chest has started to hurt a little, but that she was still okay."

Rossi: "Good to hear. Hey JJ, Reid says that Will and Henry are doing just fine and can't wait to see you get outta that damn car."

JJ, who has now given up on most of the pretense and was just slightly grimacing, hand still over her chest, looked at Rossi and processed the information slower than usual. She then smiled and nodded. Her sluggish movements causing everyone concern, meaning she probably has a fever now as well. It's been one hour and 5 minutes since exposure…this was way too soon.

JJ looked back over through the windshield as she noticed the lights of the CDC vans on their way over to her. She closed her eyes and sighed with relief. She didn't notice Dr. Kimura show up from behind her car and pull Hotch and Morgan over for an update.

Hotch: "She's definitely getting worse, and fast. This is way too fast for standard strains, it has to be the strain from 2009. She's only been infected for about an hour or so, and she's already showing bad flu-like symptoms. It doesn't help with the amount she was exposed to, and in an enclosed space for a long period of time."

Kimura: "It's definitely disconcerting that she went downhill this fast, we need to get her out of that contaminated air, and into treatment NOW! I'm gonna go over and evaluate her the best I can, the CDC can set up the decontamination tent around me and the wacky girl."

Hotch: "Right, that's Garcia, she's been successfully keeping JJ calm for the time being. But I know JJ's son wanted to come see her. Would it be too dangerous to let her see him through the window…while she's still…relatively okay? It might lift her morale seeing for herself that he's alright."

Kimura: "If they aren't showing symptoms yet then it means they weren't exposed being near the car earlier, there is no reason to think that as long as the window stays shut he shouldn't be just fine."

Morgan: "I'll go get Reid."

Morgan enters the house to hear laughing from Reid and Henry in the living room. Looking in, Will wasn't in there. He looked around for a minute to find Will in the kitchen, with what looked like a Scotch. He didn't blame him.

Morgan: "Hey Papa JJ."

Will: "Derek."

Morgan: "We just got the all clear from the Doc to let Henry and you out to see JJ through the car window. The CDC will be setting up a decontamination area around the car so you have some time."

Will looks up at him for the first time, eyes red and puffy, almost dead of feeling at this point.

Will: "Have Reid take Henry out, I can't have her seeing me like this, she needs to stay positive…How is she doing?"

Morgan lies: "She's still doing fine for now, just a few light flu-like symptoms (he lied). You're sure you don't wanna see her before she leaves for the hospital? Should hopefully only be another hour or so tops."

Will read between the lines: "Yeah, I'll be out there, just gimme a few to get it together. Bring Henry out first, he's been askin' bout her."

Morgan nodding in understanding, he felt for the guy. He knew how it was killing even him to have JJ locked in that car helpless. He can't imagine how Will feels. His family is his world.

Morgan heads back to the living room and gives Reid a nod towards the door.

Morgan: "They're ready for him."

Reid: "Great, you excited to see Mama, Buddy!?"

Henry: "YEAH! Can Mama play!?"

Reid: "Not right now little man, but as soon as she gets back later ok."

Henry: "K, Mama's fun at playing! I can't wait til she play again!"

Reid picks up Henry and follows Morgan outside to see the CDC on the sidewalk, countless emergency personnel, Dr. Kimura and Garcia over by the car, and Hotch and Rossi discussing something on the lawn. As he walks up the window Kimura looks at him and steps aside. She had already briefed JJ that Henry was coming out, it was perfectly safe, and she should just enjoy seeing her boy.


	5. Chapter 5

CHAPTER 5

Henry: "MAMA!"

Reid: "Hey Mommy, look who missed you!"

JJ: "Heeyyyy Little Man!" she sniffs "Are you having fun playing with Uncle Spence in the middle of the day! Super crazy fun right!?"

Henry: "Yeah! He's fun! Can he come at morning more?"

Reid: "Maybe little guy, on the weekends and stuff."

JJ let out a weak giggle: "Henry, he'll come over anytime you want as long as we aren't away catching the bad guys, right Spence?"

Reid: "I guess you guys have me wrapped around your finger, who can say no to that?!"

JJ puts her hand up to the glass for Henry.

JJ: "Hey Henry, you know if you put your hand on the glass were Mama's is, it's like we're holding hands through the window! Cool right? Wanna do it?"

Henry: "COOL! Yeah!"

JJ was just letting a couple of tears rolls down her cheeks when she saw Will at the door of the house. He looked sad, but was smiling at what he saw. She locked eyes with him for a few seconds and then he started walking over.

Reid saw and handed Henry over to Will as he walked up. They all (except for the CDC) gave them some space just to say whatever they needed to say.

Kimora to Hotch: "Yeah, I agree, she's deteriorating too quickly. As soon as she gets out of there I need to have that antitoxin IN MY HAND to give to her. Hopefully it's the same strain and it works. And on top of that, it needs to work FAST. As soon as she develops aphasia, she'll need it administered within about 30 minutes. Anything longer than that could result in permanent neurological damage. Honestly, by the way she looks now, that might be inevitable."

Hotch: "Well everyone will be keeping a look out for her well being every second. (as his phone rings) Hopefully that's good news now. Excuse me."

Hotch: "Alex, tell me you have something."

Alex: "Yes Sir, the General pushed through the red tape and we'll have the antitoxin within 30 minutes, where should I take it? How's JJ?"

Hotch: "Hopefully she'll be on her way to a hospital soon, but call me when you are leaving and I'll let you know. You might have to take it straight here. The situation with JJ is getting to be more time sensitive than we'd originally hoped."

In a silent moment of processing for Alex, she responded with a quick 'Got it' and immediately hung up.

Hotch to Kimura: "They should have the antitoxin in roughly 30 minutes, then if they come here it's another 15 minutes, the hospital is about 10 from there. Hopefully they can get her out, hosed down, and on the way to the hospital in that time."

Kimura: "Well it looks like they are almost finished with the Decon. Tent. I'll ask the group leader if he has a time frame."

JJ: coughing hard in between sentences "Will, I'm sorry about all this. I know this Replicator situation has gotten out of control…I never meant to put you guys in danger. Maybe I should have suggested you leave town, but I figured the security detail was enough until it escalated… I guess now it's escalated." She said sincerely through watery eyes. Not knowing what else to do but apologize for her family's situation.

Will: "JJ, there was nothing you could've done to prevent this, we both take down bad guys every day. Either one of us could be a target for any number of monsters. You just happened to draw the short straw today Darlin'. No tears. I wish I could wipe them off that pretty cheek of yours and kiss them away."

JJ just wiped her tears that had started flowing and looked down as she sobbed for the first time during the ordeal, this just made her cough more. Will sighed sadly and let out a few tears of his own. He hated seeing her like this. He had known it would've been a matter of time before she broke down. That's one of the reasons he stayed inside as long as possible earlier. He didn't know what to do for her.

JJ looked up at him, eyes glassy but with new resolve and determination. She had pulled herself together with as much fake-bravado she could muster for her family: "I love you. Both. I'll be okay, they're gonna get me out, and get me the anti-stuff. I'll be back to normal kickin' the ball with this handsome guy sooner than ever!"

Will: "You're talkin' about me right Sug..?" He added with a smile and a wink.

She laughed and put her hand up the glass again. Henry did the same. She felt a pang of pain in her chest. She wasn't sure if it was from her maternal instincts screaming to hold her child, or if it was the toxin again. The stuff had been lighting her chest on fire periodically for the past hour.

She could tell her fever was getting worse. It was harder to focus and stay alert with the headache that had developed. She would find herself staring listlessly at her son, or even past him at the sky, until Will or Henry's voice would pull her back.

The team and Will could all tell she was starting to fade again, as they kept taking turns trying to keep her attention with random information the CDC was giving them. Finally, they were ready with their tent. Everyone tried to contain their excitement over this good news. After continually watching their friend get worse and worse with no medical help to be administered, they knew they had to conserve celebration for when the medication was working and she was out of the woods.

As Will took Henry back into the house, Kimura, Reid and Garcia stepped away from the car, and the CDC boys put the last of the secure tent around the car door. They could finally get JJ out of the "Super Anthrax" engulfed vehicle. They had scrubs waiting for her in the tent to change into after decontamination.

All ready in their big suits and everyone else a safe distance, Jennifer was told to open the car door, and step out carefully onto the plastic surface. As she unlocked the door, she let out a sigh and began to breathe a little faster out of sheer anticipation to be getting out. As she did, she let out a few coughs, which turned into a fit as she hit the cooler air. The CDC personnel understood the effects of Anthrax, and allowed her to slowly regain control and step wobbily out of the car.

If she thought sitting in the car was tough, JJ wasn't prepared for how much her body would hurt upon standing. All of her muscles ached from the poison, much like the flu, and she was unsteady as it was from the fever. They had anticipated this and made sure they had a chair in the tent for her to sit while they hosed her down. They carefully helped her undress out of her suit, which was clearly still covered in white powder and sweat from her fever.

JJ, always fairly modest, would have been slightly embarrassed had she not been so concerned with simply trying to stay alert enough to follow simple direction. Her head was pounding, her chest felt like it was on fire, and her breathing had gotten noticeably worse. She could barely focus her eyes at this point, and was getting dizzier the longer she stood. Luckily they got her undressed and sat her down on the chair. She didn't care about the sting of the water pressure, she was just excited that this tent was not see through so that the entire neighborhood didn't get a show.

They were finished spraying her and took her into the next small plastic room, where they proceeded to spray her again with what seemed like a different type of misty, chilly liquid she assumed to be some sort of antibacterial type situation, she didn't care.

JJ was freezing and shivering, half from being soaking wet and half from the fever, which had spiked since getting out of the car 10 minutes ago. The female CDC agent, and eventually Garcia helped her towel off and change into the scrubs in the decontaminated portion of the tent. Garcia didn't mind a slight risk as long as there was an antitoxin readily available. Her friend needed her there. All the while JJ was in a light foggy state, a bit slow and shaky, and not really fully aware of her surroundings. As they got her into the scrubs, Garcia noticed at least seven small lesions on JJ's arms, neck and legs. Penelope remembered this from Reid's infection. They were a progression, followed closely by aphasia and then respiratory distress…of which JJ was already showing signs. She also noticed her face was flushed and her fingertips were turning a light bluish hue. Neither good signs.

By the time they got her out of the tent and onto a stretcher it had been 15 minutes since she left the car and 2 1/2 hours since initial exposure. When Will and Dr. Kimura ran up to the EMTs and her stretcher she was trying speak.

Will: "Hey Amor, how are you feeling, happy to be out of there? It's good to hold your hand baby."

Kimura: "JJ what are you feeling?"

JJ: "Uh" She was shaking and hot to the touch. "Catch…" She looked confused.

Will: "Hotch?"

JJ: Shaking her head and wrapping her arms around a the blanket they gave her "Catch..?" She let out a sizable frustrated grunt and grimaced. She shook her head, putting her hand up to her forehead to stave off the headache.

Kimura: "Cold, she's trying to say she's cold. Aphasia has set in, her brain and voice can't properly connect what she's thinking to what she's trying to say. We need to get her that antitoxin. NOW!"

Will just stared at her for a second, as did JJ. JJ looked over to Hotch, her eyes pleading for good news.

Hotch: "Alex just got to the hospital with the antitoxin, they are waiting for you there, you'll have it in 15 minutes JJ, just hold on til then!"

Kimura: "That's great news, Jennifer, we have to move though, right now!"

As they were wheeling the stretcher over to the ambulance, Reid ran up with Henry.

Reid: "Say bye to Mama, you'll see her soon okay?"

Henry: "Okay, Bye Mama! I love you!"

JJ blew him a kiss as they loaded her into the ambulance. Will joined her, holding her hand, along with Dr. Kimura.

Reid to Garcia: "Well…I guess that leaves him to us."

Garcia: "Gimme gimme gimme!" She said while still crying from the stress of the day.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: I know this chapter is shorter comparatively, but I wanted it to be fairly suspenseful. Sorry, not sorry. It was originally going to be even shorter, but I relented. Enjoy.

CHAPTER 6

BACK AT THE BAU

Hotch charges into the conference room where the remaining team had assembled as JJ was getting let out of her vehicle.

Hotch: "What do we have so far? I've got Henry set up with Reid in Garcia's office so they can help as much as possible."

Rossi: "Well, from our new profile, our UNSUB is a white male, between the ages of 35-50, either with heightened Pentagon clearance, or with the significant hacking abilities to make it appear as such. This narrows down our list considerably."

Morgan: "He's holding some sort of psychotic grudge. He's close enough to us that we wouldn't suspect him, but distanced enough to where we wouldn't catch on to any odd behavior."

Blake speaks up interrupting: "Unless he's odd already?"

Morgan: "How do you mean?"

Blake: "Well what if this guy is just odd enough to where we laugh him off. He feels like he's so close, but will never actually be part of the team…"

Rossi: "Then he snaps, he can't handle what he perceives as the rejection! UNSUB's an obsessive! He wants to be part of our family so badly because he's seen it from the inside, but never touched it!"

Hotch: "And he's a floater, not part of any specific department for long periods of time, not very close to anybody else other than the BAU. For some reason he feels connected to us, and like we feel he's not good enough to be part of the unit permanently. He's angry or desperate. Or both."

Morgan: "But why JJ first? The note she received had her whole family's names on it, they were all supposed to be in that car. What does he have against her family in particular?"

Blake: "Maybe that's what he desires? That's what he wanted most, but it didn't work out for him that way and he's jealous. Either that, or he blames JJ for taking away his chances of having that family.

Rossi: "But WHO would feel jealous that way against JJ? She's never dated anyone in the department or the Bureau."

Morgan: "Yeah but look at her, I'm sure she's been approached."

Hotch: "No, this isn't a standard rejection, this is far more complicated. It goes deeper, I don't think this UNSUB was involved with JJ directly, but indirectly. For some reason he feels like she's responsible for the initial rejection that broke him from the team and ruined his chances at the perfect life he feels she has?"

Morgan: "Holy shit! I know who it is!"

Morgan gets up from the chair and darts out the door, the rest follow him down the hall, through the bullpen down to the beautiful tech analyst's office. He busts through the door startling everyone in the room.

Morgan: "GARCIA!"

Garcia: "Chocolate Thunder?! Geezaloo!"

Hotch: "Morgan what is this!?"

Morgan: "Garcia, I'm sorry, but this is going to happen and you're going to let it."

Garcia: "Ok, I trust you…what's happening?"

Morgan: "PG, when you and Kevin broke it off, what was the reason…SPECIFICALLY? Everything you can remember!"

Rossi: "Aww man."

Garcia looks over at Rossi and Morgan, confused as to the nature of the personal question…but complies.

Garcia: "Well…uhh…he wanted a family, to unplug and move out to the country away from all of this." Speaking fast and nervously.

Morgan: "And? I know there was more, I remember you telling me more…REMEMBER!"

Garcia: "OK! OK! Pushy! Uhhh ummm…He…he said let's just leave, buy a farm, and have babies and get old. I said I wasn't ready for a family, for kids, I wasn't sure if I wanted to bring kids into this life we lead. Uhhh…I said I didn't wanna be too far away from Henry cause he is my godson. That JJ is family, and you guys were family. That was enough for now…um…that's it I think. Or at least the gist of it."

Rossi: "And with them, and ultimately us out of the way, she'd want to make a family with him."

Hotch: "Garcia, we think Kevin is 'The Replicator'".

Her face falls completely now understanding what is going on, her mouth hung agape and a tear falls from her eye. This was not happening.

Could this have been all her fault? Again?

Hotch: "Penelope, listen to me, he fits the profile perfectly, if it turns out to be true, it's totally on him, are you listening? It has absolutely NOTHING to do with ANYTHING you did or said…okay? Garcia?" He stared at her blank eyes with all of the seriousness his serious face can muster.

Garcia: "yeah." Quietly, stunned.

Morgan: "Baby Girl, do you know where he might be right now?"

Garcia: "Oh my god!"

Rossi: "What Garcia?"

Garcia: "I talked to him about JJ, and the Anthrax case. He already had clearance so he knew what was going on, but I told him about how scared she looked, and about her reservations about keeping policy…how afraid she was that her son would be exposed…he knew…"

Morgan: "PG! Focus!" He said, snapping her out of it. "Where. Is. He. NOW!?"

Garcia: "Ummm, it's 11:30? He's usually just getting ready to go to lunch. You can probably intercept him at his car within the next half hour."

They all go running out, including Reid, leaving Henry with her, both crying.

She yells after them: "CHECK ON OUR GUMDROP, DON'T LET HIM GET TO HER!"


	7. Chapter 7

CHAPTER 7

AT THE HOSPITAL

JJ, Will, and Kimura plus various doctors and nurses bust through the doors of the emergency room. At this point JJ was still breathing on her own, but unable to speak coherently as the aphasia had taken a firm grasp. Her fever spiked even higher to 104.3 and she was flushed, but shivering. Her scrubs were already drenched with sweat just from the 15 minute ambulance ride, and she was coughing erratically in random spasms that would last at least a minute each. She noticed but couldn't tell Will that she couldn't feel his hand on hers. She started to slightly panic, but there was no way for anyone to know what was going on in her head. JJ barely knew herself.

Will was still holding her hand through the doors and into the ER until they reached the Trauma Room, where he had to stop and watch from outside. Dr. Kimura came in screaming for Blake who had already dropped of the antitoxin with the ER physician and gone back to the bureau to do the UNSUB profile workup. She had wanted to catch this bastard as fast as possible, and end the terrorism of her team.

The attending physician, Dr. Kohr, had been waiting for them and as they entered the Trauma Room with JJ, he was not far behind carrying the medication.

In seeing JJ's condition, and hearing how rapidly she had deteriorated, he knew this was the specific type of deadly Anthrax he had previously seen in his hospital 4 years ago.

Kohr: "What's her status?!"

Kimura: "Progressed, and quickly, she was exposed 3 hours ago, tops. Already has all the standard flu-like symptoms recorded, plus confusion, lesions and aphasia."

Kohr: "After 3 hours!? What's her temp!?"

Nurse: "Temp 104.3 sir!"

JJ could just groan from pain every time they moved her or adjusted her body, her muscles ached everywhere and she felt so cold. She was shivering violently, and could barely focus on what they were saying, not like she could answer any of the questions anyway. Any time she had tried to speak in the ambulance they told her it was coming out wrong due to her condition, so she got frustrated, stopped speaking, and starting crying out of anger at her situation.

Kohr: "My god, how much of the pathogen was she exposed to!?"

Kimura: "She was locked in an enclosed car with a noticeable fine white coating on pretty much everything in the front two seats and some in the back. She still had powder on her hands and suit when we finally were able to get her out…after over 2 hours."

Kohr: "No wonder, that's constant DIRECT exposure inhaled over hours! I've literally never seen anyone with that kind of exposure before, they are pushing the serum now, if it's going to work it should show at least SOME effect within one hour. If it doesn't start help, she won't make it very long. Once the meningitis symptoms set in, she's only got a matter of hours…maybe."

Kimura: "I met this girl during the original Anthrax strike in '09. She's smart, strong, compassionate, and has a family…we need to get her through this." She glanced over at Will.

Kohr just nods solemnly and yells for them to get her up to ICU.

Will, standing right outside the door heard the whole conversation, every so often Dr. Kimura looking back at him with sympathetic eyes. 'I wonder if she's gone through anything like this before in her profession with someone she loves? Probably.'

He followed as they rushed her up to ICU, but couldn't get in the elevator. Sprinting up the stairs, he is met on the floor with a dull waiting room, and an "Authorized Personnel Only" sign on the door. He goes up to the nurse's desk.

Will, nervous and out of breath from running: "S'cuse me miss, my wife Jennifer Jareau was just brought up from the ER to ICU on the elevator, can you tell me where I can find her?"

The Nurse checks the computer: "She's not in the system yet, which means they haven't assigned her a room and they're still working on her in the ICU Emergency Unit, if you have a seat, I'll keep searching until she comes up, honey."

Will looks at her deflated and disappointed. He's worried out of his mind and upset about not being with his sick, beautiful wife.

Nurse looking straight at his eyes: "I know this is hard, not doing anything. But they're doing the best they can, and they need to concentrate right now. I'll do my best to get you information, Sweetie."

Will, voice breaking: "Appreciate your kindness ma'am, thank you very much."

Nurse: "It's Doris, honey. And let me know if I can get you anything while you're up here."

Will: "Thanks, um, can I use a cell phone up here?"

Doris: "Even better, use one of my lines, just hit 9."

Will picks up the receiver and dials JJ's mother, gives her a full update, then dials Hotch and does the same. Hotch updates him on the suspect situation and informs him they are sending over protective detail for both him and JJ. In the meantime, he tells Will to look out for Kevin, just in case he shows up. They still haven't intercepted him and he could be anywhere. Will thanks Hotch and turns around to flop down in one of the exceedingly uncomfortable chairs.

He flashed a thought at their family earlier in the day, JJ yelling at them that they were being boys and they were making her late. Then all he could see was the look in her eyes when he first locked with them after she had locked the doors on him. He had never seen his wife make that face, and he never wanted to see it again. He put his head in his hands and cried all the tears he'd been trying to hold back all day, albeit sometimes unsuccessfully. He cried for ten minutes straight until Dr. Kimura came out into the waiting room, looking exhausted.

Will stands up.

Kimura: "We are pumping her full of the antitoxin, there's no need to start to worry until about 40 minutes if she doesn't start to respond. For now she's holding steady about the same. Unfortunately she was pretty bad when she came in, so she's not in good shape. Right now we're trying to stave off possible seizures, more nerve swelling, and we're trying to keep her oxygen up. She doesn't need to be intubated yet, but if her oxygen level gets any worse it might be the best thing for her."

Will: "When will I be able to see her?"

Kimura: "Well, I'd prefer if we waited until she hit the threshold of the antitoxin response. To see if she gets any better. There's no need for you to see her like this for any longer if she's just going to get better. But it's your call, she's highly medicated and will be confused, in pain, most likely very frustrated."

Will: "I'm seeing her! There's no reason for her to be scared and hurtin', and also alone. I NEED to be with her in there, no matter what."

Kimura slightly smiling: "I thought that's what your answer would be" as she shoots him a wink and nods for him to follow her through the doors.

Will: "Thanks Doc."

Doris smiled a slight smile, hinted with sadness as she watched the broken man follow the doctor through the "APO" doors.


	8. Chapter 8

CHAPTER 8

IN THE PARKING GARAGE-BAU

Morgan clicks his radio: "It's been too long, it's already 12:15, Garcia says he ALWAYS leaves for lunch BEFORE noon."

Hotch over the radio from another car: "I agree. Let's get to the hospital to check on JJ. Reid, stay here with Garcia and Henry. It's probably killing her to not be with JJ, but Henry needs to stay safe right now. She needs support Reid, especially after Kevin."

Rossi: "The whole building is on a silent alert for this guy, if anyone sees him, they'll call immediately and carefully get Henry out of dodge."

Morgan: "Right, let's go. This bastard isn't going to touch JJ or our family again."

IN GARCIA'S OFFICE

Garcia is rocking Henry in her arms back and forth as he sleeps. He had been crying for his Mama for 30 minutes and fell asleep in her arms. Truthfully, she had been crying along with him. All this was too much. Everything had changed in a matter of hours and she was having trouble reconciling the idea of JJ on death's door and Kevin being responsible. She was so angry. She almost was at the point of breaking her anti-violence vow. If Kevin came in and tried to hurt her precious babies again, she'd take him down herself. 'Maybe…UGH I'm so confused' She thought. 'How could MY Kevin be this evil?'

She was broken from her thoughts by Reid quietly entering and whispering her name.

Garcia: "Sweet Pea, How'd everything go with Kevin? Or…the Replicator?"

It was easier to think of him with the UNSUB name instead of the name of the man she used to love.

Reid: "He didn't show, the rest of the team is going to the hospital to watch out for JJ while she's being treated."

Garcia: "Is there an update on Gumdrop?"

Reid: "Not yet, last we heard, Will said they had taken her to ICU and she was the same as when she got there…just…worse."

Garcia's face dropped: "I'm going."

Reid: "Garcia, there's nothing you can do there til they know if the antitoxin will work. The best thing we can do for JJ right now, is keep that little boy safe for her."

Garcia knew this was true, but she was dying not being able to hold her Cupcake's hand through the hardest time in her life. Thinking about her so sick made her want to start crying again immediately. She let it happen, and Reid lent her a shoulder and a supportive ear.

AT THE HOSPITAL

Will stared into JJ's hospital room at her. She looked so weak, so tired. She was still shaking and sweating. Her face even more pale than before. Her eyes were open, but she would just keep looking around sluggishly at the flurry of activity around her, it didn't seem like she was registering much. She was just furrowing her brow most of the time in confusion and pain.

Will, walking in with a smile: "Hey amor. You look better already."

JJ looked over at him, not quite meeting his eyes, but smiled thankfully at his blatant lie. She even let out that little, soft, JJ sarcastic "Not funny" laugh. As if to say 'Yeah right, liar.'

Will: "I love you darlin', you're gonna be alright. You're the strongest person I know. Morgan's guns ain't got nuthin on you, firecracker." As he smiled, he also winked at his wife.

JJ took a deep, painful breath, and nodded in understanding, before falling into another coughing fit. This one worse than he had seen, she struggled to breathe and grimaced in immense pain in her chest and throat. She reflexively squeezed his hand tight as it slowly passed, she noticed that it was purely reflex, she still couldn't feel his hand.

She let out a pained cry before slowing down and choking down some more fiery breaths into her damaged lungs. Tears pouring from her eyes, he noticed a trace of blood in her mouth. He calmly got her a glass of water and helped her drink a sip, then stepped outside the door to tell Kimura what he'd seen.

Kimura: "Unfortunately, it's not uncommon for patients to develop a tear in their bronchial passages or trachea from the coughing. It doesn't necessarily mean the Anthrax symptoms are getting worse, but it IS a step backward in her recovery."

Will: "So what does that mean for her?"

Kimura: "Well, once the patient has blood in their airway, it's more likely they'll need longer term care until it heals, on average an extra few days or so. Also it increases the risk of intubation due to the physical pain mere breathing causes the patient post-tearing."

Will tried to smile at her, but it came out as almost a wince. It was like hearing about JJ's pain had physically hurt him in some way.

Kimura: "She is going to have a longer road ahead of her now Will, we are doing all we can but JJ will need plenty of support to get through this."

As if on cue, the rest of the team came busting through the ICU doors, Doris following them hurriedly.

Doris: "Doctor, I'm sorry, they had badges and just came in. What do you want me to do?!"

Kimura: "It's fine nurse, I'll talk to them."

Hotch: "How is she?"

Morgan: "Anything new?"

Kohr walks up, seeing what all the excitement is about.

Kohr: "Excuse me, this area is authorized personnel only…"

Hotch: "FBI, I need an update on my team member."

Kimura: "It's alright Dr. Kohr, they can stay for an update." She turns to look at them "But then they have to go right back to the waiting room."

Hotch: "One of us is to stay by her door at all times, for her and Will's safety. This guy isn't going to get to her family again."

Kimura: "Fine. ONE person…OUTSIDE her door!"

Rossi: "OK we got it, now how is she!" Looking at the newer, more worried look on Will's face.

Kimura: "Her temp is still too high at 103.8, she's just barely holding on to her respiratory status, if she gets any worse we'll have to intubate. As it is, she has a tear in her airway and it looks like she's coughing up a slight amount of blood according to Will. She still can't speak properly due to the aphasia, and she's in quite a bit of pain due to her chest, head and muscle aches."

Morgan: "Aww JJ girl..."

Kohr: "We are giving the antitoxin another 10 minutes or so to start working before we really should start worrying. There's a chance she will turn around and make it through just fine."

At that statement, they heard loud beeping and yelling coming from her room.

Nurse: "Dr. Kohr, she's seizing!"


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: This chapter is a little shorter and more angsty, I'm ok with it. The angst only gets worse so brace yourselves haha.

CHAPTER 9

_Kohr: "We are giving the antitoxin another 10 minutes or so to start working before we really should start worrying. There's a chance she will turn around and make it through just fine."_

_At that statement, they heard loud beeping and yelling coming from her room._

_Nurse: "Dr. Kohr, she's seizing!"_

Will: "What!?"

Will and the doctors started running over, but Will was held back by Hotch and Morgan.

Morgan: "Let them do their job man…she'll be ok…just let them work…shhh…"

Morgan had pulled Will into a firm hug, partly for comfort and partly to keep Will in check. He was surprisingly sympathetic and calming. JJ and her family bring his compassion out sometimes.

Will: "She's hurting! I need to go to her!"

Rossi: "Will listen, she's going to come through this! She'll be ok! She's probably just seizing due to the fever, like Henry did that time! And he turned out to be just fine after. Okay? Remember?"

Will just gave up struggling, still held up by Morgan as he slumped back into the bigger mans arms and broke down again.

Will, crying: "I can't lose her…she holds us together. Without her, everything is just dark."

Rossi: "We understand, trust us…we know."

Hotch had gone over toward the waiting room door, facing away from them, he let a few tears roll down his cheeks. 'That's all that I'll let go.' He wiped them away, let out a deep breath, and went right back over to the group.

Hotch: "Let's go over to the waiting room and wait for the doctors to give us an update, come on. We'll get you some coffee Will."

Rossi quietly to Morgan: "Where's Alex?"

IN THE ICU WAITING ROOM

Alex was standing outside the APO doors in the waiting room watching as everything unfolded. She didn't know JJ or Will very well yet, but already knew how special she was to the group. JJ was the heart. The center of everything. Mom, little sister, big sister, profiler, she was someone important to everyone. She had heard about all the time that JJ was gone and had a hard time imagining everyone functioning properly. As she saw the hurried activity head towards JJ's door, she turned away and went to sit down in the chairs.

She didn't want to watch, and she didn't want to get in their way. Alex's brother had Lymphoma when they were in their 20's. Her whole family spent hours, days, weeks in hospitals watching him slowly waste away. She hated waiting rooms, but she hated the ICU more. Alex had promised herself years ago, after he passed away, that she would never enter an ICU again. Not unless it was to say good bye. She had heard the familiar sobs and screams of grief coming from Will through the doors. Alex refused to look over. She knew they'd be coming in here soon and she have to brace herself. Put on a brave face for them. What she was going through had nothing on Will and JJ's plight right now, even the team's. She would be expected to be the strong one. Since Alex wasn't quite as close to Jennifer, her judgment would be expected too be less clouded by emotions. Unfortunately, being in this setting made that impossible for her.

As Blake heard the doors open, the crying sound got louder, she took a deep breath and looked up at them. Will was a wreck, staring blankly in no particular direction at this point. Morgan was basically carrying him in. Hotch had held the door open for them and Rossi was saying comforting words to Will. As they stepped through, Hotch stayed behind and went back to JJ's room to guard her. Alex stood up and went over to them.

Alex: "What happened?"

Rossi: "She seized, we figured we should bring Will in here for a bit until they get her restabilized."

Morgan: "What happened to you?"

Alex, trying and failing not to look rattled: "I got an update from Doris..um..the nurse out here. I figured I'd watch the door to the stairwell, there's no security."

Doris heard her name and glanced with her eyes over to Blake, thankfully not calling her out on the lie. She sees people freeze up at that door all the time, understanding that most of them have a past trauma they are trying to avoid.

Rossi saw right through her but didn't say anything either: "Good thinking, we'll need your clear head today. Lord knows none of us have one."

Alex: "I'll give it a shot." She said with a telling and doubtful sigh.

A few minutes later Kimura came back out and gave them an update.

Kimura: "We were able to stop the seizures…"

Will: "Seizures! She had more than one?!"

Kimura: "After everything she wound up having 3, only a minute or so apart. But we stopped them for now. Hopefully she'll be waking up shortly and we can get a handle on her neurological status."

Will: "Could the seizures have caused any permanent damage?"

Kimura: "It's always a possibility, but it's way too soon to tell. No doubt she'll wake up confused and disoriented, but that's standard. And honestly, she was confused and disoriented when she came in anyway, so hopefully she'll be about the same or better. The antitoxin should be taking effect any time, and hopefully we'll see a marked improvement in the immediate future."

Will: "Can I go see her now?" He said, barely having had put himself together after breaking down before. He had a new resolve now that the timing for the medication was almost up.

Kimura: "Sure, Agent Hotcher went in to sit with her until you got back so that she wouldn't be alone."

Will: "Great, let's go in then."


	10. Chapter 10

CHAPTER 10

BACK AT THE BAU

Garcia hangs up her cell. Through slight tears, she calmly explains the situation to Reid, who was holding her free hand. Her other hand holding a still sleeping Henry on her lap.

Garcia: "Morgan said she had a few seizures due to the fever, but nothing else has changed. They are waiting for her to wake up to evaluate the effects of the seizing."

She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. Looking straight at Reid with her worried eyes, "She's gonna be ok right?"

Reid: "You know how strong she is. Have to ever even seen her GET sick? And when she got into those fights last year, she refused to even go to the hospital both times. The only time she ever went was for that concussion, and it took her getting knocked out by a shovel!"

Garcia: "Yeah, (she chuckled) that one's a tough cookie. I'm gonna have to start using Morgan's nickname for her, it makes her sound like a Pro Wrestler."

Reid and her both slightly chuckled at "The Pennsylvania Petite". Reid agreed, it does amusingly sound like some sort of professional fighter name. Maybe a boxer or something.

Reid: "Ever since she started training with Morgan, she's gotten a little bit scary good. God forbid we catch Kevin when she's well enough to fight him. He'd be in horrible luck."

With that Garcia, frowned again, remembering the situation they were all in. Just then an alarm went off on her computer screen. She carefully and quickly handed Henry over to Reid with a worried look.

Garcia: "There is a security alarm on one of the maintenance doors at the hospital! Call Morgan now! I'm pulling up video!"

IN JJ'S ROOM

Will to a sleeping JJ: "Hey babe. I know you're tired Sweets, but it's time to wake up now. Don't make me play that cell phone alarm that you hate so much! We have passed that 'threshold' thing the doctors keep talkin about, so it's time for you to wake up and start talkin' ok love?"

He squeezed her warm hand. It was clammy for her temperature, but he couldn't care less. He needed constant contact with her to make sure she was still there with him. A monitor start beeping, Dr. Kohr came in with the sound.

Kohr: "It's ok, it's a good beep" He could see Will's worried look. "It means her oxygen level is up a little, this could be a very good sign. Her temp is 103.0. Still too high, but down from before…Will…this is good news okay?"

Will: "Yeah Doc, thanks. I just wished she'd wake up you know?"

Kohr: "I understand. Just think, when she does wake up, she might be talking to you again. Either way you can talk to her. I don't expect any more seizures at this temperature, but she'll still be disoriented, with one hell of a headache."

Will: "Got it, thanks."

Dr. Kohr walked back over to Hotch and Kimura at the door to give him an update. Then Dr. Kimura walked out to the waiting room to tell the team.

Hotch: "What do you think? Really."

Kohr: "Well these updates are getting better, I'm actually starting to get hopeful that she'll make a full, or mostly full recovery."

Hotch: "And if it's mostly?"

Kohr understood the question: "Well, if the poison or seizures have any long term effect, it will probably present as nerve or brain damage. Mild to moderate. Hopefully it'll stay in the non-existent range, but I can't rule it out as a possibility."

Hotch: "And?"

Kohr: "Well, I've seen Anthrax patients, who lived, present with any thing from a sluggish cognitive functionality, various types of palsy in the face or extremities, lesser motor functions. I've even seen vision effected. It's too soon to tell if she'll have ANY of these and if she does, then to what degree. It's not worth speculating over until she wakes up and we do a complete neurological work up."

Hotch: "Got it. Well we'd hate to lose our best sharp shooter." He said this, clearly trying to stave off the actual amount of his concern for the younger agent. With a slight smile, Kohr went back over to the Nurses station to pretend to look at charts. In actuality, he was running through scenarios in his head. He didn't even tell Hotch about the possible long term lung effects the poison could have, or the permanent confusion and disorientation some patients had experienced. Why go into it if it's too soon to tell. Right now he was still hopeful.

BACK IN THE ROOM.

Will: "So Henry said while we were in the house earlier, that tomorrow he wants to wear whatever color Mama is wearing. We'll have to get him a white and blue polka dot shirt I guess. He'll happily wear it as long as he can be like his Mom. He loves you, you know, so you have to quit goofin' around and wake up so we can get you back to normal. You're not getting away from us that easy, girl. Not after I finally wore you down and convinced you I'd never leave you. I know that's why you didn't wanna marry me at first, you had been hurt before, and you didn't trust I was all in on this. I guess it took gettin' shot for you to realize I was worth the risk huh? Ha, if I'd have known that I would have done it years ago."

JJ, sluggishly: "Mmm mmm."

Will: "JJ!, What?"

JJ, in a tired, groggy voice: "No way."

Will: "Haha! Hey there Sweets! Just woke up and givin' me a hard time already! Hey Hotch! Get the Doc! She's awake!"

JJ, in a pained whispery voice and grimacing: "Yelling…shhhhhh."

Will, quieter, realizing she had a crazy headache: "Sorry Amor, that's my bad, how do you feel, besides the obvious headache o'course. Your words seem to be okay now." He beamed a big grin at her.

JJ: "Ow."

Will: "What hurts Mama?"

JJ slowly and quietly spoke, still not daring to open her eyes: "Everything…my head…chest." She coughed quietly. "Throat."

Will: "Yeah baby, I know, it's to be expected with what you went through. But your temp is going down, you're talkin' right, and you're gettin' better all the time. I love you."

With that JJ opened her hazy, blue eyes. She was a little blurry because of the fever, she blinked a couple times to shake the brightness away, and tried to fight back the headache that it caused. For the first time since before she got out of the car she was able to focus on Will's face and look at him straight in the eye. She smiled weakly but brightly. Some of her energy clearly having returned.

JJ: "I love you too." She squeezed his hand lightly, smiling that she could perform the action. Her face then turned towards worry "Where's Henry, is he safe?"

Will: "Oh yeah darlin', he's at the BAU with Penelope and Reid. They are holed up in her office until they catch up with Kevin."

JJ looked confused: "What…"

Will: "They figured out the Replicator, they are pretty sure it's Kevin. Some crazy obsessive, revenge, profiler jargon."

JJ: "Wha… Why? Garcia…"

Dr. Kohr had literally been waiting out at the door to give them a minute, but now that the topic of conversation had turned upsetting for JJ he stepped in.

Kohr: "Okay, that enough of that talk, Jennifer, nice to see you alert! I'm Dr. Kohr, I don't know if you remember me from earlier, it's probably pretty hazy right?"

JJ just nodded, again grimacing from the loud voice. Touching the palm of her free hand to her forehead.

Kohr: "Sorry, I'll be quieter, I just have to do a neuro exam on you and check on your vitals, see how your progressing, but seeing as your temp is at 102.6, it seems as though the antitoxin is doing it's job and you should get through this, okay?"

JJ nodded again: "Sure, ok…" She let out another small yet painful cough and moved her hand from her forehead to her chest again. She tasted blood from the cough and when she pulled back her hand it had spots of blood. With a deep breath she almost panicked until Will grabbed her and hand and forced her to look at him.

Will: "JJ! Listen, it's okay, you airway is just a little hurt on the inside from coughin'. We noticed it earlier, the Doc said you were gonna be ok, alright darlin'? Okay?"

JJ took a couple of shaky breaths, not letting the water in her eyes fall and nodded. Whispering "Okay", because that's as loud as she dared to talk.

Kohr: "Will, I'll have you just step outside as I do my exam, you can tell your friends she's doing much better."

Will smiled at the Doctor, knowing he had no choice.

Will: "Alright then, but I'm coming right back!"

JJ: "Ok, Love you."

Will: "Love you too sweet thing."

With that he kissed her forehead and let go of her hand, turning to walk out and talk to Hotch.

Hotch had been accidentally eavesdropping, he could here everything that was going on from his position. He was trying to keep his manly, stoic demeanor while the Doctor was standing outside, also listening in.

Will: "Hey Hotch, she's awake, she's okay!"

Hotch: "I heard. Do you wanna tell the team or do you want me to do it?"

Will: "I think they'll be more happy to hear from you, plus I ain't leavin' this area til she's leavin' with me."

Hotch understood: "I'll leave you alone just for a few minutes, then I'm sending someone right back to stay on guard duty."

Will: "It's all good here, I'll been watchin' like a hawk, believe me."

Hotch nodded and headed towards the waiting area.

As he walked through the doors he was startled to find no one there. Checking the stairwell, he called Rossi's name, getting no response. He went back in and asked Doris where they went.

Doris: "I'm not sure sir, one of them got a call, and I yelled at him not to use the cell phone on this floor. He went into the stairwell and when he came back he said something like 'Let's move' and something about an alarm? Either way they all jumped up and followed him out the onto the stairs and they are all talking at once."

Hotch checked his cell phone, and there was a text. 'Damn it', he must've missed it due to the earlier commotion and the excitement of JJ waking up. The text was from Morgan:

"HOTCH, UNSUB IN THE BUILDING, WE'RE CLEARING EACH FLOOR. STICK WITH JJ. DON'T WORRY THEM YET."

Hotch: "SHIT!"

A/N: Sorry (not sorry) for the cliffhanger. It's ok because I post like three chapters at a time anyway. I just figured it would be a good place to break. This is where things get interesting! I have a question for the followers, I'm not sure whether to put this whole story in one shebang, or make a separate "aftermath/recovery" story? What do you guys think. If I make it one there will be a bunch more left in this. If I separate it out then there will be a few more chapters in this one and then a few chapters in the next one. Feedback? Yes? No? Thanks for following!


	11. Chapter 11

CHAPTER 11

Hotch turned and booked it back into the ICU bursting through the doors to see a swarm of Doctors and Nurses all buzzing around JJ's room, inside and out. Will was on the floor outside her door, awake but with a bleeding wound on the back of his head. He was still laying on the ground struggling with the orderlies to let him up"

Will: "Lemme go, I gotta go after them! That's my WIFE!"

Hotch immediately knew what happened. The worst possible outcome. As he ran towards JJ's room, he saw Dr. Kohr in the corner with a large cut on his face, he assumed was from the butt of a pistol. JJ nowhere to be found. He didn't even bother to stop and ask the details.

Hotch, on his phone: "MORGAN! He's got her! They're still in the building it's only been a minute or two. LOCK IT DOWN!"

At this point he was running toward the elevators, the only other exit to the ICU floor, screaming at nurses who pointed him along the way in the direction in which they had seen the armed man and the obviously sick woman head.

Morgan over the phone: "HOTCH! WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?! Whatever! We almost have all the exits covered! Is she even AWAKE?!"

Hotch finishes clearing the floor and heads toward the elevator to go down to the ER. "She's awake and responsive, but still in no condition to be out of bed, let alone running around with a gun to her head!"

Morgan: "Shit Hotch! The elevator stopped!" He drops the call, running ahead to find maintenance to help open the elevator. Hotch runs back to the stairs.

EARLIER IN JJ'S ROOM

Dr. Kohr was checking JJ's eyes while Will step outside.

Kohr: "Ok, your focus is a LOT better, looks like you won't have a problem getting that sharpshooter eye back soon. Let me just check the nerves in your arms, and legs. Don't be concerned if you're not up to par right away, lag time before full recovery is perfectly normal, alright?"

JJ nodded at him tiredly: "I understand, thanks."

As he moved her arms around, her muscles still ached, her right arm seemed to get a passing grade as he had her do a couple of quick reflex and motor tests. Her left arm, on the other hand (quite literally), was a lot harder for her to move around properly. He still gave her at C+, joking with her. Opening her fist was harder than it used to be.

He was about to check her legs. When they heard a loud grunt from outside and then a scream from a nurse. Then Kevin busts loudly and quickly through her door and pistol whips Dr. Kohr before they could even react. JJ tried to get out of bed, but she was too slow and he grabbed her arm pulling her up. She gasped in pain. She could barely stand from her aching muscles, but at least she was able to focus better than last time she was standing. She was also a little less dizzy and able to understand what was happening.

Thankfully, adrenaline kicked in. It helped with her through the pain breathing and walking caused…it was actually more of a dragging run. She was bleeding from her arm where the IV has ripped out. It had all happened so fast, he literally just ripped her away from all the machinery that she was attached to, crashing most of it to the floor. Luckily, Dr. Kohr would explain later that she had already gotten the entire dose of the antitoxin into her system before being forcefully detached.

As they were "running" through the ICU floor, he dragged her along with a gun to her yelling at the nurses and doctors to stay back. She had a minute to evaluate her condition better now that she was less startled. JJ noticed that along with her left arm and hand, her left leg was also much weaker than her right, as she ran with a distinct limp. The pain in her chest was sharp as she breathed in, and it has radiated to her throat and ribs as she ran. Every so often she'd cough up some blood onto her hand. It weirded her out that she was getting used to it.

JJ's pain was the least of her concerns by the time they reached the elevator. Kevin was rambling on about something on the way to it, but since she had no idea what the original profile was on the UNSUB she couldn't piece it together right away. Whatever his original issues, he had clearly devolved at this point. Only an UNSUB who was desperate would go this far and not worry about being caught. While in the elevator she got more of the full picture.

JJ: "Kevin, what the hell is going on?" she said out of breath as the door closed.

Kevin: "Come on Jennifer, don't you know me well enough by now?! I mean for god's sake I was at your wedding!"

JJ: "With someone other than PG…I don't even know you anymore."

He hit the Emergency Stop before they fully got down to the Emergency Room.

Kevin: "Well you will! She wanted your family! Not mine! It's your FAULT! My life COLLAPSED because of you and your son, and your FUCKING TEAM! All she would talk about 'Oh! We're a family! Oh! My Godson! That's all I need! I don't need any more family!'. It was RIDICULOUS! Why didn't she want ME!?"

JJ: "Kevin, I…"

Kevin: "SHUT UP BITCH! If she can't give me one, I meant as well make one with you! You and your perfect son! And your perfect FUCKING LIFE! Oh I'll be a part of your little fucking family!"

He smacked JJ in the cheek with his pistol. Just hard enough to put her down on the ground, but not knocking her out.

Kevin: "Oh, You're gonna enjoy this. You'll forget all about the weak little BITCH husband. Nobody likes him anyway! It's clear to everyone that he's not good enough for their PRECIOUS little Jennifer and her perfect FUCKING SON!"

JJ: "Just like you weren't good enough for Penelope!" She said, spitting out some of the blood that had collected from the force of the hit.

JJ was pissed off. First of all, no one talks about her family that way. And secondly, she figured out what he was about to do and was NOT about to take it lying down. She figured pissing him off, though painful for her, would deter him from wanting her.

Kevin: "You bitch! I WAS good enough! She was just so warped into this idea that bringing kids into the world was a bad thing, that she SETTLED! She was WEAK, TOO!"

JJ: "And I'm not weak? I can barely stand!"

Kevin: "You have a son! You know what it's like to be part of the family! We can have that! You, me, even Henry! The team! I can be part of it! I'M SMART TOO! I DESERVE IT!"

JJ scoffed: "How!? How do you deserve MY son!? Did you give up your life!? Your job!? Did you stick by me throughout my pregnancy, love me?! TAKE CARE OF US?! Did you wait around for YEARS, until I got over my SHIT and FINALLY agreed to marry you!? NO! Will did that! WILL deserves me! NOT YOU! A little, petty man, who needs to take women by force because HE CAN'T GET ONE TO MARRY HIM!"

This sets him off. She'd let her temper take her too far. Kevin kicked her in her already pained abdomen and pulled her up. JJ was on her feet, but only hunched over clutching her stomach and being held up by him. She had been having trouble breathing before her rant, which took it out of her. Now she could barely catch her breath.

Kevin punched her again in her jaw with his free hand, and hand held the gun up under her chin forcefully, hurting her even more.

JJ was pushed up against the wall of the elevator now. He started to rip at her gown. Taking much welcome extra time to pull her robe off first. He ranted the whole time, but she wasn't paying attention. Nothing that he was saying mattered, all that mattered was that Emergency Stop button. Luckily for her, it was on her right side. She lifted her left hand, which she couldn't take out of fist position anyway, and weakly punched him. It was just enough for a distraction. He laughed at her and switched his gun hand to his left, holding her left arm down with his right. She smacked the Emergency Stop with her newly free right hand as he was laughing and ranting more. He didn't even notice as the elevator started moving again.

She was thankful that the hospital had left her bra and underwear on when they dressed her into the hospital gown. They must not have had time to fully change her over in all the fuss. Again, like in the tent, it's not that at this point she would have particularly CARED if she was exposed, but it was nice to have at least something still covering her body when the doors finally opened to the ER.

Suddenly, too many voices to count yelled all at one time: "FREEZE!" "DON'T MOVE, LYNCH!" "FBI!" "LET HER GO!" "PUT THE GUN DOWN!"

Everything you can possibly think of that trigger happy law enforcement officers would say was surely said.

Kevin was so startled when the doors opened that he loosened is grip on her and the gun, and looked out towards the full ER. He was off his guard.

JJ reached up and grabbed his gun with her right hand, and simultaneously hit his forearm with her left arm, releasing the gun from his grasp to hers in one swift, martial arts movement. He barely even had a chance to look back at when she pulled the gun up with her one hand and fired one shot into his forehead.


	12. Chapter 12

CHAPTER 12

JJ was able to brace herself on her right leg and with her right hand on the wall for just long enough to be able to slide down the side of the elevator gently to the floor, still trying to catch her breath from the hits earlier.

By the time everybody recovered from the shock of what they had just seen, JJ was sitting on the floor of the elevator, and Kevin was lying against the wall on the other side, dead. The elevator doors started to close, jarring them all out of their daze. As they jumped forward, JJ quickly looked up and punched the wall where the "Door Open" button was, opening them back up again.

Rossi was the first one over to her, quickly taking his jacket off and throwing it around her half naked, bruising body.

JJ: "Really? At this point…does it matter."She said through very labored breathing, and immediately coughed up some blood.

She gave him a half smile, then grimaced and yelped weakly as he picked her up off the floor.

David: "Well we wouldn't want you to lose all self-respect, clearly you're the worst shot in the department."

JJ: "Thanks, I try." She started to give off a little laugh, but instead slightly groaned in pain, while just starting to catch her breath again. "Where's Will, is he ok."

David: "Are YOU ok!?"

JJ: "Nope."

David: "Ever the goofball. Well, I think he's a little better off than you are right now. So lay down!" He placed her gently on the stretcher that was waiting for her just a few feet away.

Hotch: "JJ, you alright?"

She answered with a slight nod and a shaky deep breath. As she did this she tried to run her hand through her hair out of stress, but released not only was her left hand still in a fist, but also possibly broken. She just grunted out of frustration.

Dr. Kohr comes running through the crowd of cops. "Alright let's CLEAR OUT! We need to get her through! COME ON OUT OF THE WAY!"

The cops, security, and FBI personnel cleared a path for him to JJ.

Kohr: "Aww man, alright, let's get her back up to ICU stat! And somebody get me the orthopedic surgeon and neuro!"

JJ: "Damn, did he mess up my face that bad?"

Will, from out of nowhere: "You're as beautiful as ever amor! You alright!?"

JJ: "I'll be fine. You okay?" She was getting more out of breath as the adrenaline wore off and the pain in her ribs and chest got more severe. She started wincing with every breath and sounding a little more labored.

Kohr: "Sounds like you're having a harder time breathing than before, you need to calm down, less joking, more breathing. You do have to tell me what happened. Just the pertinent injuries, and anything that I need to know medically."

JJ: "Umm…yeah…uh my arm is bleeding from the IV…he hit me, with his fist in my stomach and face once or twice each, I don't remember exactly, and with the gun once in my face." She took another couple of struggled breaths. "Other than that, I had to run, which sucked, and stand, which also sucked. You were right about my left arm, but it's my leg too, both are weak."

Kohr: "Got it, now relax, we'll take good care of you. How would you like some hardcore pain meds, huh?"

JJ: "Yes, please." Turning to her husband. "Will, he's dead, go get Henry."

Kohr looked up at Will: "We're gonna knock her out for a while, go."

Will let go of her hand and they held a short gaze as the doctors continued to whisk her away towards the other elevators. Then jolted and sprinted in the direction of the doors.

Luckily, Hotch had been following along with the entire conversation. While running behind Will, he was able to catch up with him, and drive him to the BAU. No one wanted Will on the road with his head injury. Plus, Hotch needed to do something, he felt responsible for the whole mess.

GARCIA'S OFFICE

Garcia and Reid sat staring at her monitors. Garcia crying, and Reid holding Henry, continuously checking to make sure the little boy was still asleep.

Garcia had seen Kevin on the back maintenance door monitor after it had tripped the silent alarm.

Reid immediately called Morgan to tell him what was happening and told him to notify Hotch. After that, Garcia followed as best she could over all of the security cameras in the hospital. By the time she found him, it was by accident when she checked the ICU camera to make sure JJ was still safe. She clicked her monitor to the camera and almost immediately saw Will by himself, then getting clocked in the back of the head by Kevin's gun. If she hadn't seen it for her own eyes, she still wouldn't have fully believed Kevin was that deranged.

Reid tried to call Morgan, but by that time JJ was already gone and Morgan had missed the call. When they got in touch with him it was a moot point, as Hotch had gotten there and told him what happened. They both got the full show in the elevator. Without sound of course, it was torture.

They saw Kevin pull her in, yell at her, hit the E Stop Button…etc. They were helpless. The only good that they could do was calling Rossi while the team was trying to mobilize a rescue, and give him the play by play of what was going on. He was privy to every detail as they saw it happen, so he was ready for the doors to open. He had already gotten the entire world into the ER outside of that elevator, ready for it to continue on its heading. The three of them could just sit and hope JJ found a way to get the elevator moving again without much further injury. When Reid saw her smack the button he alerted David, who in turn made sure everybody was ready at the door, including him with a jacket.

Once they saw her smile at Rossi, they were relieved to at least know that she was alert, and probably joking.

Garcia was crying due to every possible emotion she could think of all at once. Happiness, fear, excitement, relief, sorrow, empathy, anger, regret. Everything was running through her mind, all of the horrifying images. The fear and anger in JJ's eyes. The cold, psychotic, rage in what used to be the eyes of her former lover. It had been about 6 hours and her entire life has turned upside down. Not to mention her best friend's life would be changed forever. She saw JJ sit, holding out and being strong, she couldn't believe the uncanny strength her Cupcake had shown during this entire ordeal. Garcia couldn't stand to think that this was brought down on JJ by her. She realizes that it was indirect, and not her fault and blah blah blah. But there was no way she was going to go through life and not blame herself for her family almost dying. She'd never fully forgive herself.

It had been quiet between her and Reid for a while after they saw JJ's "rescue", or should they say "JJ rescuing herself". Hotch had called to say him and Will were on their way to pick up Henry, so they decided to stay put and ride with them back to the hospital. Not like Garcia would be able to drive anywhere right now with the state she was in. The door opening jarred her out of her thoughts.

Will: "Hey, is he still asleep?"

Henry, stirring: "Daddy? Hi Daddy. Where's Mama?"

Will: "We're gonna go see her right now buddy." He said it with tears in his eyes as he finally held his son again after everything that had happened. Overjoyed he was able to tell his son that they were going to see Mama, and that she was gonna be okay.

Henry: "Daddy, why you sad?" he said sweetly wiping a tear from his father's eye.

Will: "Not sad buddy, super happy that Mama is okay and we can go see her. Aren't you happy?"

Henry, excitedly: "YEAH! Gonna see MAMA!"

Will: "Alright! Let's go little man!"

He left as everyone followed through the now empty BAU to the car. The FBI had cleared everyone out from the Department during the search for Kevin. All that were left were three agents at various points who had been assigned for Henry and Garcia's protection. Also Agent Anderson, who was a friend of JJ's, and decided to stay out in the hall to make sure everything was ok. Hotch assured him it was on their way out, and Anderson stated he would follow them to the hospital.

Anderson: "I respect the hell out of that woman, she's my friend. I wanna make sure she's all good before I head home."

Hotch: "That's fine, any support she can get is welcome."

With that they all headed back.

A/N: You'll probably be getting more updates than usual, I'm trying to get most of the story uploaded before I go on vacation this weekend. Let me know about the separate stories thing. :)

JG


	13. Chapter 13

A/N: This chapter is forever long, but it'll be the last for today. As I said I'm trying to get it finished for you guys :) Behold! JJ on morphine! Some humor finally. I threw something in there for one of my reviewers. I hope they pick up on it ;)

CHAPTER 13

BACK IN THE WAITING ROOM

Alex, Morgan, and Rossi all sat in the chairs waiting for an update. They were still worried about JJ's declining health, since she had taken a beating and was having trouble breathing after she got out of the elevator. Rossi was especially worried since he knew the details of what was happening to her in the short time she was with Kevin. He couldn't get Garcia's voice out of his mind… 'He's ripping at her gown! Oh God David! He's got her pinned up against the wall!'

She had been hushed trying not to wake Henry, which made her sound even more broken and afraid for her best friend. It gave him the chills to hear her voice saying those words. He'll never get over that.

Hotch and the rest, including Anderson now, burst into the waiting room from the stairwell.

Will: "Any news on her condition?"

Garcia: "How's my Gumdrop!?"

Henry: "GUMDROP IS MAMA!" laughing and clapping! He loved Garcia's nicknames for him and his Mommy.

Garcia: "That's right Mini-gumdrop!"

He giggled again at that. It was refreshing for everyone to hear his laughter, almost like it was over, and the healing could begin.

Doris: "Ohhhh this must be the famous Henry! Hey, buddy! I'm Doris! I work here with the doctors! Do you wanna play with some crayons I've got behind my desk? I hide them for special little guys like you!"

Henry: "YEAH! DADDY I CAN GO DORITS?!"

Will: "Haha yeah buddy, go ahead and I'll check on your Mom ok?" He mouthed thank you over to the nurse, who has made it her business to make sure this family had less of a hard time while there.

Henry: "K Daddy, you bring back Mama wif you?"

Will: "How about I go back there and then come back and get you to take you to her later, huh?"

Henry: "Oh…OKAY DADDY!"

Doris laughed and took him from Will to head around behind her big nurses' desk. There was already another nurse there, but Doris stayed behind because she heard they were coming in with Henry, and wanted to help so that the team didn't have to worry about him.

Will walked through the APO doors completely unhindered by any of the staff. At this point they all knew what the family had been through and he had pretty much free reign in their eyes.

As he made his way over to JJ's room, Kimura and Kohr were discussing further treatment for JJ. As they saw him walk up they smiled brighter than he had seen them yet today.

Kimura: "WILL! Hey! So I was just discussing with Dr. Kohr how WELL JJ is doing, I mean in spite of everything, she is in remarkable shape!"

Will: "What? Really? Last I saw she was barely breathing right?"

Kohr: "Well that was due to some bruising on her ribs caused by the blow she took in the elevator, also she still has some of the after effects of the pathogen in the lungs. She'll be sore and breathing heavy for a while, but she also got some nice pain medication now that we were sure she was out of the woods with the toxin. We couldn't give them to her earlier because we needed to access her cognitive function, which in listening to her explain what happened in the elevator, seems just fine."

Will: "Thank god, she'd be a mess if she couldn't work."

Kimura and Kohr looked at each other, smiles dropping into concern.

Will: "What? What'd I say?"

Kohr: "Well, Will, here's the thing, her left side is still suffering from some neurological aftereffects. We aren't sure how long they'll last. If they're temporary, then we're looking at intense therapy, probably for a few months until she's back to peak condition and cleared for the field. If it's permanent, then she'll still need the therapy, probably for about a year. Even then, the way it is now, she probably wouldn't be able to get field rated again. Although, it doesn't look like it'll affect her shooting skills much. Thankfully."

Will: "She always was a great shot. Well, she is a profiler, so they aren't in the field all the time. She was never really in the field much with her old position with them anyway. She's more of the heart, and added brainpower to the group. But something makes me think that my wife will still be able to kick the shit out of the bad guys no matter what neuro-crap is goin' on. She's pretty scary."

Kimura: "Or so we saw downstairs."

They all chuckled, and Will went in to see his drugged up, sleepy wife.

JJ: "Heeyyyyy darlin'"

Will: "You makin' fun a me?"

JJ: "Maybeee."

Will: "I wouldn't have it any other way."

JJ: "I'm very high right now…"

Will: "Yes, I can see that" he chuckled "don't be tellin' Henry stuff like that when he comes in her in a little bit to see his Mama!"

She perked right up, not really effected by her rib pain at this point.

JJ: "Is he here? Is he okay?"

Will: "He's just fine, everyone's here outside in the waiting room, a.k.a. Hell."

JJ: "Welllll bring 'em on in! I've got clothes on this time and I'm all high. Feelin' no pain. I feel like I've got like…at least 8 minutes until I'm asleep."

Will laughed: "Oh brother, I guess we'd better get started, it's two at a time, I'll send Garcia in with Henry first. Priorities, I know."

JJ: "Aww…how is Garcia? She doesn't blame herself does she?"

Will: "I'm sure she does somewhere in her freaky little head. But outwardly, she's aware that it was all Kevin."

JJ: "Good, bring my little Treasure Troll in here…and Henry."

Will: "I'm telling her you said that."

JJ put her hands up like 'Don't Shoot': "Very high…"

THE WAITING ROOM

Will walked through the doors laughing. They all looked up fairly startled and confused.

Will: "She's gonna be fine. There is a possibility of a little left side nerve damage, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it."

There was a collective sigh of relief.

Will: "In the meantime, everybody has to take FULL advantage of her being high of her ass on pain meds for as LONG as possible. That being said, she can have visitors 2 at a time. We voted for, and I quote 'Her Little Treasure Troll' (pointing to Garcia), and Henry." He reached for Henry picking him up from behind the counter.

Garcia laughed like she hadn't laughed in a thousand years, and also cried tears of joy that her friend was still goofy after everything. 'I guess the breakdown everyone was waiting for today never came.' She thought, relieved. Unaware of JJ's breakdown in the car while talking to Will.

Garcia scooped Henry out of Will's arms and burst through the APO doors.

Garcia: "Where's my Sugar Cookie!?" Henry laughed again

Henry: "Haha Mama!" He said as he spotted her though a window.

JJ looked over at the sound of her son's voice. Dr. Kohr, who was speaking with her about medication side effects realized immediately that he had lost her, and might as well just leave now. As he walked out he passed a crazy person holding a mini, little boy version of JJ. His smile lit up that room, and he assumed that when JJ was at her best, hers did the same.

Garcia: "Heyyyyyy 'Treasure Troll'? SERIOUSLY?!" Penelope jokingly scolded at her friend, who had started crying as she pulled her son close on her bed with her right arm.

JJ held her hands up again in surrender, left hand still in a fist, wrapped in an Ace bandage, and not as high as her right.

JJ: "I give up!"

Henry: "Haha Mama, you're funny, hey you have booboo on your face? AND HAND! They hurt?"

JJ: "Not right now sweety, trust me, NOTHING hurts right now!"

Garcia laughed, then got serious for a minute.

Garcia: "JJ, I know they keep saying it's not my fault, but I am SOOO sorry this happened to you! All of it! Indirectly, I'm partially respons…"

JJ: "Sshhhhhpppsssssshhhhsshhhhh! Stop it!" She pointed at Garcia's nose. "NOT responsible. NO!" She said as she tapped her nose again like scolding a puppy. "STOP IT!"

Garcia: "Ok so, this is officially the worst, and simultaneously the most hilarious day of my life, and I'd take blackmail video of you high, but the bruises on your face would just make me cry. So you're lucky this time Missy!"

JJ: "No videos...that would be...weird."

Garcia: "Agreed"

Henry: "Mama, Auntie Pen take video when I do funny stuff all time!"

JJ looked at him and smiled tiredly but didn't answer. She just hugged him close again.

Garcia: "Okay sweetie, why don't we let Mama get some sleepies and we can come back tomorrow k?"

Henry: "K, PG!"

Garcia gasped: "Who taught you that!?"

He just giggled adorably.

JJ let out a tired chuckle: "Tell everybody to go home, I'll be dead to the world for a looooong time, and I prolly won't remember any of this tomorrow anyway." She slurred.

Garcia: "Oh I hope you don't! I'm gonna have way too much fun telling you all about it over and over Janis Joplin."

JJ just looked at her tired and wobbily and confused.

Garcia: "I'll tell you again tomorrow, minus some morphine."

JJ shook her head, almost like she understood what the hell was going on.

Garcia: "Bye Mama!"

Henry: "Bye MAMA!"

JJ: "Bye bye baby! Bye Popsicle!"

Henry laughed at the nickname, he liked that his Mama was saying funny things like Auntie Pen.

Garcia laughed out of the room, feeling both better and worse about the situation her faux-sister was in. She cried again.

WAITING ROOM

Everyone stood up as Garcia and Henry walked into the room, she was crying still. Henry was laughing because she was tickling him.

Will: "What's wrong, what happened?"

Garcia: "Nothing, she's fine, everything's ok, I'm just little…overwhelmed."

A collective sigh let out from the group.

Morgan steps up: "Me and Dave won rocks paper scissors to be able to go in next."

Garcia: "I'm sorry honey, but she's gonna be out like a light from the drugs any minute. She said, or slurred, at me to tell everyone go home and you can come back tomorrow if you want. Either way, I'm not letting any of you in there when she's that drugged up. If she remembers any of this, she'd kill me for letting you in. Haha."

Morgan: "She's that bad?"

Garcia shooting a fake angry look at Will: "I don't know why he even let ME in!"

Will: "She asked for you! Plus it's you, and it was too funny to keep to myself, it would be selfish."

Garcia: "No really though, it's hilarious. Gumdrop's high as a kite."

Morgan: "Damn, I wish I could see. She's always so…JJ-like."

Reid: "How do you mean?"

Morgan: "She's a control freak, kid. She would never let us see her all crazy. Even when we go out for drinks, she keeps it to a mild tipsy level. She's got so many embarrassing drunk blackmail stories on me, I just wish I had one on her!"

Garcia: "Alright, she booped my nose."

Rossi: "Booped? Do I even want to know?"

Garcia: "Well, she was 'scolding me' (she uses air quotes) and she tapped her finger on my nose. Kind of like you'd do to a bad puppy?"

Morgan: "That's more than enough ammo. I appreciate it. I just wish I would have had a shot at that bast…(being mindful of Henry) butt head. Nobody hurts our BAU Mama and Baby Girl and gets away from me. I feel a little jipped." He receives a collective nod from the others, they are just as angry they didn't get a shot at Kevin as he is. "On that note… let's get outta here, I know I need a few DOZEN drinks. "

Rossi: "I'm right there with you"

Reid: "And third."

Alex: "I think I'm gonna head home…today sucked, I just want my couch and my wine. Penelope, it's pretty early, do you wanna bring Henry by for dinner? I assume you're taking him tonight?" She looked over at Will.

Will: "Ain't no way I'm leavin' here til the Boss kicks me out. And I don't think she's gonna be able to do that until at least tomorrow. So if you can, that would be fine"

Hotch stayed back as the rest of them headed out, and walked over to Will.

Hotch: "Will, I'm so sorry that I wasn't there to protect you both. I should've never left my post. I'm to blame, Kevin obviously was watching and waited until I walked away.

Will: "Nah, man. I was so wrapped up in everything, I should've been paying closer attention. I was standing watch over my wife's room, and I let her get snatched up. If it's anyone's fault…You know what? It's that bastard Kevin's.

Hotch looked confused.

Will: "Well I know she ain't gonna let us blame ourselves, so I'm trying to get used to at least OUTWARDLY saying it's his fault. Maybe one day we'll start to believe it ourselves."

Hotch nodded: "Well, I'll be at home with Jack and Beth, if you need ANYTHING, just please call. You need to know we are always going to be here."

Will startled Hotch by pulling him into a hug: "I know man, thanks for everything. You can come back tomorrow to visit, I'll let you know when she's awake before everybody else."

Hotch: "I appreciate that."

With that, Hotch walked out, and Will headed back in to JJ's room. She was already fast asleep, her left arm secure over her chest. He looked her over as he sat. Analyzing every painful injury. Trying to imagine what that maniac had done to her, and the real toll it took. He wasn't sure how she was actually feeling. Dr. Kohr had informed him that most, if not all, of the time she had been here thus far, she had been in some degree of medical shock. Therefore, it was hard to tell what her emotional damage was going to be from being in the car and the attack. He told Will to possibly expect a good degree of anger for a while, frustration at her injuries, irrational and uncontrollable fears, not to mention PTSD related mood swings and nightmares.

Will didn't want to think about all that right now, he just wanted to hold his wife's hand and lay with her. He scooted up onto the bed the best he could, and she adjusted in her sleep, putting her injured left hand over his chest instead of her own. He didn't dare move until she woke up about 12 hours later.


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: This story will be complete by the end of the work day today. But I'm going to break in between uploading chapters. I leave for vacation tomorrow and I don't wanna leave you guys hanging. Enjoy. JG

CHAPTER 14

JJ'S ROOM- 5 AM

The nurses had been in every hour or so to check up on her vitals. JJ's fever had gone down to 99.8 by midnight, and was normal by 3 AM. Her oxygen levels were in an acceptable range, and they weren't too worried about them getting worse, as long as they kept her pain under control. Will didn't move, but did look away while they stitched up the cut on her face from where she was hit with the pistol. She was so passed out from the drugs that she didn't even flinch.

JJ had a black eye on the right side of her face where Kevin had punched her, but the orthopedic surgeon assured him that no bones where broken in her face. On the other hand, she did break 3 bones in her left hand. His theory is that this was because she was unable to make a proper fist when she hit Kevin, and it hurt her hand more than usual. Unfortunately, it was going to hinder therapy to repair the nerve damage done. She had some bruising on her body from various things, being hit, falling, being thrown against the wall…and more than a few bruises from where Kevin was grabbing her and she struggled during the attempted rape. As far as the doctors were concerned, it could've been much, much worse for her.

As 5 AM rolled around, Will had dozed off for a few hours. It was still dark outside, but the glow of the TV still filled the room, as Will had been watching infomercials all night.

Will woke up to light pushing at his chest. As he looked over at his wife, she was still asleep, but with a grimace. She was lightly crying and pushing her broken hand against his chest. JJ looked scared even in her sleep, he knew she was having a nightmare, but wasn't sure of what.

JJ, quietly, almost a whimper: "Let me out" She pushed him again. "Lemme out!"

She got louder as she continued, obviously coming out of her drugged stupor.

JJ: "Let me out of this DAMN CAR!"

Will got up off the bed instantly and gently held her left arm so she didn't hurt her hand even more.

Will: "JJ! Amor. Wake up Sweetie! Wake up, your dreaming. Baby you're dreaming! Shhh, shhhh…"

JJ: "GET ME OUT OF HERE! WILL!" She also screamed, as her fearful eyes popped open, red, glassy and full of tears. She stopped for a second, looking around and getting her bearings. Then in one look to Will, she took a deep, shaky breath to calm herself. That was clearly a mistake.

JJ gasped and let out a small cry of pain, clutching her chest. A slight noise was all she could muster at the time.. "Ah."

Will: "JJ, shhhh it's okay, you're okay, it was just a nightmare."

JJ looked up at him and he saw how much pain she was in, she could barely breath. On cue, the nurses ran in with a shot, they had been alerted by her heart rate, which Will just realized had started beeping erratically. One of them shut the alarm off, the other plunged the syringe into her IV and squeezed the bag to push it through a little faster.

Will laid her back down as best he could with her still clutching her chest and gasping for air. He noticed she was shaking and sweaty, not from a fever this time, but from residual fear from her nightmare, which he assumed was something about being in the car.

JJ calmed back down when the morphine took effect and relaxed back fully into a laying position. It took another couple of minutes for them to get her breathing under control. Her adrenaline had taken hold and she needed a moment to calm down. Will put his hand over hers at her chest, and slowly made deep in and out breaths for her to mimic. He tried to keep eye contact with her, and gently gave calming words of encouragement. Eventually, she laid her head back, closing her still bloodshot eyes. She exhaled a couple more deep breaths, then nodded her head that she was ok.

JJ said quietly, not using her full voice: "I'm alright. I'm okay. I got it." She exhales again, still wincing a little each time.

She didn't cough once, which was vast improvement from the night before. The nurses had told Will that in between Garcia's visit and when she passed out, she had one or two coughing fits in just a minute or two time. That's when they gave her the stronger sedative causing her to be out for so long.

Will: "Good morning, Love. Are those pain meds kicking in fast enough?"

JJ, roughly: "No. Can't they do what they did yesterday?" She let out another soft, but deep exhale through her mouth. Her eyes were still closed and brow still furrowed.

Will: "Sorry chere, they can't be lightin' you up on morphine forever. They had to lower your dosage. It's some pretty strong, addictive stuff."

JJ: "Sucks." she breathed out.

Will let out a sad laugh: "I know baby. Doc said it'll probably hurt to breath for a while. Kind of like a really bad chest cold."

JJ: "Whatever...stupid Anthrax." She winced again, and opened her eyes.

Will could see instantly how much pain she was in as she looked over at him.

JJ: "Good morning. Sorry. That was unexpectedly rough." She sat up a little..very slowly. Her whole body still hurt and movement was pretty difficult. How she got up and was walking/running/getting dragged yesterday she'll never understand. She tries not to think about the pain it caused.

Will: "Obviously understandable, everything you been through, bound to have some nightmares."

JJ: "I was talking about the coughing and breathing thing, but now that you mentioned it, those were pretty crappy, too."

Will: "You wanna talk about it? From what I heard it was either elevator or car right?"

JJ: "Car. And what did I say? No, you know what? I don't care, I'm not ready yet. I'm sorry."

Will: "Baby that's fine, you don't have to talk at all if you don't want. Can I get back into bed with you? You should get back to sleep."

JJ: "You were in bed?"

Will: "Haha, yeah, been laying next to ya for 'bout 12 hours now. You were out like a light. By the way, they stitched up your face real nice."

JJ surprised, lifted her left hand to her face to notice a thick Ace bandage, and brace. She looked at it, then at Will confused.

Will: "Broke yer hand when you punched him."

JJ tried to remember punching him, it was pretty blurry, but it came back to her in a few seconds when she thought hard.

JJ: "Oh…forgot about that…that's right. Not cool."

Will: "I know. It sucks. They need to put a real cast on it today, but they figured it could wait until you were more lucid so they could give you instructions just the one time."

JJ: "Been repeating some stuff, have they?" She laughed slightly.

Will said sarcastically: "Just a tad."

JJ: "Yeahhhh it's all pretty fuzzy."

Will: "Come to think of it, I think this is your first non-feverish, non-medically induced high conversation you've had since the car. What exactly do you remember?"

JJ: "Ummm…things? I have no idea if some things were real or not, and everything from the tent at the house, pretty much to this room is non-existant. Thank god. Fever I guess?"

Will: "Yeah that would be the fever, how about the abduction?"

JJ: "I remember more of that, but not everything. A lot was said…and I think yelled, but I'm not exactly sure what Kevin's motive was again..? I DO remember it was Kevin. Um…I ninja-ed the gun away and shot him. Then I hit the ground. That's it until the nightmares. What happened after that? Did he die? I have no clue where I shot him, I don't remember. I remember the act of getting the gun, focusing and firing, but I can't visualize it right."

Will: "Oh you hit him. Even fevered, in pain, and with one good arm, you're still the best shot in the room. Got him right between the eyes at close range. And quick too, he didn't even have time to react to you 'ninja-ing' the gun. To use your wording."

JJ: "Good word right? Garcia word."

Will: "I really like it actually."

JJ: "Me too, I might keep it. Soooo, who is this face that keeps popping up all over the place in my head? I don't recognize him from before, and I don't remember meeting him, but I seem to know him? A Doctor?"

Will: "Ahh that's probably Dr. Kohr, he saved your life like 2 or 3 times since you've been here. And please do me a favor, when he comes in, make him introduce himself again, cause he's had to do it 'bout 4 times so far, and I think it's getting on his nerves."

JJ swats him with her right hand: "Jerk, that's mean. I mean, in my defense I still might not remember his name when he gets in here, I still AM on pain meds, and his face is hazy in my brain. I hate that."

Will: "Get used to it, he's probably going to be doing a bunch more cognitive functionality tests on you in the next few days, so you'll have to be trying to recall those memories the best you can."

JJ lets out a painful sigh and pouts: "I don't wanna."

Will: "I know, it'll be tough, but you've made it through everything so far, I'm sure you'll get through that as well."

JJ: "Yeah, but that stuff happened while I didn't really know what was going on, so it was easy, now whenever I remember stuff it's so…real. Like it actually happened you know? It's highly upsetting."

Will: "I know what you mean, you're probably gonna cry. I cried."

JJ: "I will not!"

Will: "You cried in the car, and you cried last night."

JJ: "Aww man. Nobody saw right?"

Will, laughing: "Yeah most of us saw. But nobody blames you. Garcia cried for like…a day. And don't tell him I told you this, but I think I saw Hotch with red eyes at one point after he turned away for a while."

JJ: "Hotch!? No way!"

Will: "Not confirmed, but it's possible. He feels responsible for the whole shebang. Especially your kidnapping, he walked away from your door and left me to watch over your room. If anything, I'M responsible for him getting to you and Dr. Kohr."

JJ: "That's where I remember him from the most! He got clocked! And babe, stop being an idiot, you're not responsible any more than Hotch. Kevin was a crazy person. And the more I think about it the more I remember from the elevator and it makes me feel all…gross." She shutters. "Like I need a shower… OOOOOO! CAN I GET A SHOWER!? I've wanted one since yesterday morning!"

Will: "Haha, sure you can, assuming you can move."

JJ: "Right…movement. Can't you just walk me in there and sit me down or something? I still feel all Anthrax-y."

Will: "Did I ever tell you how hilarious you are on morphine? I mean, don't make it a habit or anything…but it's damn fun."

JJ: "I think I just say whatever, I don't really have much of a filter right now."

Will: "Oh I remember from last night." He burst into laughter suddenly remembering her crazy trip.

JJ: "Whoa, what am I missing, what did I say? HOW LONG WAS I HIGH?"

Will: "Oh girl, it was some crazy night. Hahaha!"

JJ: "Stop! Come on! What did I say! Wait…who saw me like that?"

Will just laughed harder.

JJ: "Who did you let in here with me all looped out!?"

Will: "Just Henry for a short visit to see his Mama, and your 'Little Treasure Troll'…a.k.a. Garcia."

JJ: "Are you serious, she's gonna use this forever. I shall never forgive you for this. She doesn't have video does she? Oh my god, please tell me she doesn't have video."

Will: "Nah, nah Sug, no worries, she was just as sad to see you all beat up, than she was happy to see you high for the first time. She came back crying half happy, half sad tears."

JJ: "Awww PG."

Will: "Oh, and she said Henry called her PG, she will be scolding us later."

JJ: "Damn."

Will: "Speaking of scolding, she said you tapped her on the nose with your finger like a puppy, and told her she wasn't responsible for any of this."

JJ: "Well, I'm assuming I was right, because how could she be responsible for anything so disgusting. But what's the story? Kevin was crazy I get, but details?"

Will: "Well, Morgan tells me he took something PG said when they broke up, warped it in his head and made it our fault somehow. Us, specifically, and also the rest of the team. Something about…"

JJ cut him off: "She doesn't want to raise a family in this world yet, we ARE her family, we're good enough for her, Henry is her Godson…yada yada. Ok I get it now. Yeah he was freaking out in the elevator, but I couldn't put it together until you said that. He had devolved by the time he took me, he was desperate, he wanted to make a family with me so he'd be accepted into the team. Creeper threatened to take make AND Henry and make our own family. After that is all red vision on my part. I started freaking out on him. I don't remember exactly what I said, but I know I gave it to him for insulting you and threatening Henry. And I know I made him mad, I think that's when he hit me."

She started to get noticeably more upset recalling the previous day's events and let a couple of tears fall.

Will: "Probably, if you were as angry as you say, I can just imagine what could come out of your mouth in that moment. You won't like Mama when she's angry."

JJ laughed through a couple of tears, Will saw she was getting upset at the memory so tried to make a little joke out of the situation to get her back into an ok mood.

JJ: "Ha. Yeah, I pissed him off pretty good."

Will: "From what I hear, Garcia and Reid watched the whole thing in the elevator play out, but without sound so they couldn't hear what was being said. It scared them to death. They were on the phone with Rossi the whole time so that the team in the ER knew what to expect."

JJ: "NO! WHY did it have to be THEM! They'll never get over it! I can just imagine how it looked to them. I have to talk to them."

Will: "Well darlin' it's 6 am, if you think they'll be up, feel free to give them a call. PG's got Henry, they might have stayed at Blake's, I'm not sure of what their plans were. I trusted them so I didn't really get too much into it."

JJ: "If I know my baby sister, she'll never sleep again after seeing what she saw. And Reid, I don't want him to get too upset either, with everything he's been through…"

Will: "Here's the phone then, Love."


	15. Chapter 15

CHAPTER 15

GARCIA'S APARTMENT

Garcia's see-through green phone rang in her bedroom. Once, twice, she woke up slowly realizing what was happening when her answering machine picked up. It was 6AM, she had literally just fallen asleep about an hour ago after crying half the night in Morgan's arms. He was asleep on the couch in her living room, and Reid was asleep on an air mattress in her guest room with Henry in his porta-crib.

"_HEY, YOU'VE REACHED THE GODDESS OF ALL THINGS INTERNET RELATED AND ALSO THE WILLING LOVE SLAVE OF THE CHOCOLATE GOD. LEAVE A MESSAGE AND IF I LOVE YOU I'LL CALL YOU BACK"_

"_**PENELOPE, PICK UP THE DAMN PHONE I KNOW YOU'RE AWAKE! GIRL IF YOU DON'T PICK UP THIS PHONE IN FIVE…FOUR…TWO…"**_

Garcia jerks out of bed and runs down the hall at her best friend's 'Scary Mom Voice'…which was even scarier all out of breath sounding and raspy…like someone possessed.

Garcia: "PEANUT! OH MY GOD! YOU'RE AWAKE! Wait a minute, what happened to the nicknames?" She sounded happy, though a little disappointed her friend was more lucid.

JJ: "THAT Sweet Thing, is never to be spoken of again, you hear me?"

Garcia: "Haha, 'Sweet Thing'?"

JJ: "Damn it, shut up, I'm still on drugs. No filter."

Garcia: "How are you feeling Cupcake, you seem a lot better, though your voice is a little…umm…demonic?"

By now Morgan had run up to her, having heard the machine pick up as well, and had put his ear next to the other end of the receiver. Reid was just stammering in.

JJ: "I'm fine, forget that. How are YOU doing? I hear you had a pretty rough day yesterday? Sorry I missed it…well…most of it."

Garcia: "She get's Anthraxed in the face, gets sick as a dog, get's KIDNAPPED, breaks bones, and shoots a guy…and she's asking me how I'M feeling."

JJ: "Well I barely remember much of it, you and Reid seem to have gotten the full show."

JJ got serious towards the end, sounding sympathetic and sad. She was worried about her sensitive best friend.

Morgan yelled so JJ could hear: "Standard Jareau! Always being ridiculous."

JJ: "Oh you've got company, huh? Not too shabby PG."

Garcia: "Oh my god, stop it, he sleep on the COUCH. Reid's here too!"

Reid yelling: "Hey JJ! Feeling better?"

JJ: "Well now you're just making me jealous of your life. Hahaha! And tell Spence I'll be fine."

Garcia: "She said she'll be fine 'Spence'"

Reid: "It sounds weird when you say it, Please stop. Hey, tell JJ that statistically 71% of all non-spinal, non-birth defect related nerve injuries are healed to at least 89% of original functionality within 6 months of the original trauma."

JJ: "Tell him to shut up."

Garcia: "She said 'Thank you.'"

Morgan: "She probably said 'Shut up'. I mean, it's JJ."

Garcia smacks Morgan and he just winks at Reid, who was still a little confused about what just happened.

Reid: "Are you guys making fun of me? I can rarely tell."

Garcia: "NO." and Morgan: "YES." Answer simultaneously.

JJ: "OK, on that note, come by with Little Man as soon as he wakes up, and GO BACK TO SLEEP! You'll need it when he starts yelling. Thank you for taking care of him for us PG."

Garcia: "Yeah, by the way, you're gonna get in trouble for that little nickname that Henry used on me last night. He used it for the REST OF THE DAY because he thought it was funny!"

JJ: "Guilty. Bygones?"

Garcia: "I can't stay mad at you…duh."

JJ: "By my love!"

Garcia: "Goodbye MY LOVE! Hey, gimme another nickname before you go."

JJ: "UGH!" She hung up on Garcia who was laughing.

Penelope felt SO much better after hearing JJ at her old self…almost. She could almost imagine her without all the cuts, and bruises, and casts and stuff. She just stood there trying not to cry tears of joy for a minute.

Garcia: "Leave it to her." She said quietly.

Morgan: "What was that Baby Cakes?"

Garcia: "Leave it to that girl to know exactly what I needed in HER time of crisis, and completely disregard her issues to make sure I was OK. The jerk's gonna make me start crying again." She sighed, half laughing half crying.

Garcia: "UGH! I hate her!"

Reid: "You love her."

Garcia: "UGH I DO! How can she always be so ADORABLE!"

Morgan: "The ways and thought processes of the Pennsylvania Petite are foreign to our mere human, mortal brain waves. It's useless to try to understand their magnificence; we need just try to sit in awe, and not stare directly into her radiance."

Garcia: "That was perfect."

Morgan: "Thanks. Reid, do you remember what I said?"

Reid gave him a look that made it clear that that was a stupid question.

Morgan: "Good, tell her I said that verbatim when you see her. Cause I won't remember it exactly."

Reid: "Only because it will make her laugh, not to give you brownie points."

Garcia, shocked: "Oh my goodness Dr.! Was that a popular culture joke? Almost?"

Reid: "I don't know, I heard somebody say it one time in that context and people laughed so…yes?"

Morgan put his hand on Reid's shoulder proudly: "My little Pretty Boy, all growed up!"

Garcia and Morgan burst into laughter, accidentally waking up Henry, who at this point had easily climbed out of the baby crib that Garcia had from years ago and had joined them.

Henry: "I can see Mama?"

They all looked at each other, they realized they were up for the day. Oops.

BACK IN JJ'S ROOM

JJ fell back asleep after the call. But not for long, Dr. Kohr walked in and got caught up with Will on her condition. He seemed pleased with her cognitive function just as Will explained her language and demeanor, but wanted to see for himself, and do a full work up. He didn't seem too worried though, for the time being.

He gently spoke her name a few times to wake her up, though Will made sure to stay in her line of sight. He didn't want her to be having a nightmare and wake up to a strange face. He didn't want to risk another panic attack and to hurt her chest more.

Dr. Kohr: "JJ? JJ can you wake up for me?"

JJ: "Hmmm? WHOA!"

She shot up to a sitting position and looked around for a second.

Will: "JJ it's alright, it's cool, I'm here."

She instantly met his eyes and calmed.

JJ: "Yeah, oh hey. Yeah I'm good." She let out a couple painful coughs. "I'm okay. Achem. What's up?"

Dr. Kohr: "JJ? Hi, do you remember me at all? My name?"

JJ: "Ummmm no not really?"

Will looked at her and winked, she looked back and nodded. Will was secretly thankful that she was joking and didn't actually forget again, he felt like it could've gone either way.

Dr. Kohr looked like he was covering up a slight irritation, but was very understanding in tone: "OK let's try this again. My name is Dr…"

JJ: "Dr. Kohr, yes I know, I was told to mess with you when you came in."

She gave a wink at Will who just shook his head in fake anger.

Dr. Kohr: "Really Will, seriously? Why am I not surprised?"

JJ: "Uhh, in his defense, I didn't know your name, I just asked him whose face it was that kept being all up in mine in the light fog that some people refer to as 'Yesterday'. He told me your name earlier. HEY! And I remembered, look at that!"

Dr. Kohr: "OK you might be my favorite patient ever."

Will: "She's definitely mine."

JJ: "That's what they say."

Dr. Kohr: "But in all seriousness, I need to run through some basic neurological and cognitive response tests."

JJ: "Ugh."

Dr. Kohr: "I know, they suck, they're like school, but when you feel like crap, and are in the hospital…and on drugs. Who knows might be fun with that last part!"

JJ: "I doubt it, they took my drugs down, so now instead of 'fun', it's just 'painful and cloudy'."

Dr. Kohr: "Not fun."

Will: "I'm gonna step outside and hang out with Doris for a while, make some phone calls."

JJ looked at him arms crossed with an attitude.

JJ: "Doris huh?"

Will: "My new girlfriend. She works in the waiting room."

JJ: "Fair enough. See you soon baby."

Will left Kohr and JJ to their work.

A/N: There is something VERY specific in this chapter that is NOT a mistake. Pick up on it?


	16. Chapter 16

CHAPTER 16

Kohr: "OK, now some of this we did yesterday, not sure how much you remember, but we'll figure it out I'm sure. It seems like you might be smart."

JJ: "Well I work for the FBI."

Kohr: "Creepy."

JJ: "I agree."

Kohr: "OK, I need you to lift both your arms straight out in front of you. Zombie style."

JJ does what she's told, her left arm though lower than her right and not completely outstretched.

JJ: "Hmm."

Kohr: "Hmm is right, it's ok, that happened yesterday too."

JJ: "It did? Damn."

Kohr: "Yeah, that might take a while to fix. Your leg too."

JJ: "Shit."

Kohr: "I know. But I'll be with you every step of the way, and I don't think we can keep you family or friends away either. They're pretty crazy."

JJ: "Tell me about it. Though I'm not to hot on them seeing me limp around with my arm and leg all jacked up either."

Kohr: "Oh Jennifer, they've already seen it. You were running around the hospital all day yesterday with a crazy person…on the security cameras. Which I've since watched so I could ascertain your condition further. It's pretty rough right now, but you were walkin'. Which is good."

JJ: "Cool. Shall we continue?"

Kohr: "Sure, can you sit up for me completely? SLOWLY."

She complies.

Kohr: "Ok, now swing you legs over the side of the bed for me, I'll help you."

He helped pull down the covers and helped swing her feet. JJ just tried to keep breathing normal the whole time, her body was killing her, especially her chest from talking so much and her abdomen where she was hit.

Finally her legs were over the side and he gave her a minute to settle and relax from the movement.

Kohr: "So that answers my question I was gonna ask later about if you were ready to walk around."

JJ snapped her head up at him: "NO!"

Kohr: "I figured. It's okay, I'm not going to ask you to til at LEAST tomorrow. Will can carry you to the bathroom for all I care."

JJ: "Sounds great" She said, finally catching her breath and sitting up straighter. She needed the help of her right arm to lean on.

Kohr: "Now, extend your right leg up as far as you can for as long as you can, it's going to hurt. I'm sorry."

JJ complies, grunting as she holds it completely outright for about 10 seconds.

Kohr: "Wow, I don't even think I can hold mine out for that long. I should work out more." He was trying to gab to give her some time to recuperate.

JJ took a number of deep breaths, again trying to catch her breath. Her face had flushed from her blood pressure. She felt like she had just done a full work out with Derek. She started to relax again. Hopefully this next one would be the last physical neuro test…'Bring on the questions, please.' She thought to herself.

Kohr: "You ready? I wanna make sure you are, because this one will be worse…I'm sorry again."

JJ: "UGHH. Alright lets do this. Can I have something in my hand that I can squeeze and break this time?"

Kohr looked around the room, and gave her a squeezeable stress ball he found.

Kohr: "That's all I got."

JJ: "Wonderful."

JJ took a deep breath and exhaled slowly while trying to lift her left leg as high as possible. The exhale turned into a grunt, which eventually turned into a scream as her leg reached halfway straight. She kept it there, taking another short breathe and holding it for 8 seconds. As she let go she exhaled and yelped. Her face red and sweaty from the effort. She coughed a few times, while grimacing and lifted her left hand to her chest again. Taking a few more deep breaths Kohr decide she was done with the physical exertion for the rest of the day.

Kohr: "Alright Superwoman, lay back down. You're done for the day. Physical therapy doesn't start for a few more days. You can bring you blood pressure up then. For now, you're still mine."

JJ: "Yes, please. Laying would be great."

Kohr laughed, but then frowned a little remembering the first time she said that the 'Yes, please' jokingly to him, half-naked and in incredible pain after her abduction.

JJ: "What? No laying? Please let there be laying."

Kohr: "Sorry, yes, of course. Lay back, I'll help you."

JJ: "Thanks..Ow. Let's not do that again today. Where did you go just then? I'm a profiler I can tell these things. Something I said upset you."

Kohr: "Not planning on telling you any of that. And I have a pretty good understanding of where your nerves are physically from this and from the tapes. We won't be doing that again until physical therapy. Speaking of. I don't know what Will has told you, but I'm gonna have to go over probabilities and time frames with you. Both for leaving the hospital, therapy, and your work status."

JJ: "Whoa..wait. Could this be permanent?" She was oddly soft, momentarily losing her bravado.

Kohr: "Straight forward, it's too soon to tell, but it's always an unfortunate possibility that you'll never get back to 100%."

JJ: "What?" she said, again softly and slightly breathless.

Kohr: "I'm sorry. I was hoping yesterday that when you came out of your fever you wouldn't have an residual effects. It's been made clear how amazing you are at your job and what an asset you are to your team. And I saw your strength first hand on the tapes from the elevator. Your like a ninja."

JJ: "That's what I said."

Kohr: "And I DON'T want this to make you assume it WILL be permanent. As I said before, it's WAY too soon to tell. We won't know that for weeks with your leg, and maybe months with your hand, due to the break the physical therapy has to be postponed, which slightly hurts your chances of full nerve, motor function recovery."

JJ: "Oh."

Kohr: "Yeah, it's a pretty shitty situation."

JJ: "I wouldn't take that punch back for anything."

Kohr let out a laughing sigh: "I can bet you wouldn't. But good luck thinking that 6 to 8 weeks from now when that cast comes off your hand and you start physical therapy. You're gonna have a ball trying to open that fist."

JJ: "Looking forward to it of course. I have a pretty good trainer, he'll work me back into shape in no time."

Kohr: "Let me guess…the huge guy."

JJ: "Of course. Pssh."

Kohr: "Figures. OK! Cognitive tests! Fun, fun! Say your ABC's"

JJ: "Seriously."

Kohr: "Indulge me. You never know where your neuropathways could've been affected. It's not over til' I'm satisfied. Remember what I said...residual effects."

JJ sighs, obviously not happy about the possibilities in his tone. She successfully recites her ABC's.

Dr. Kohr gives her a couple simple vocabulary word problems. He'd leave a word out of a sentence and she'd have to fill it in. Simple things.

Kohr casually marks notes on his chart 'Normal' 'Normal' 'Normal' all along.

Kohr: "OK, count to 20 for me."

JJ: "1, 2, 4, 7, 5, 9…"

Kohr: "Whoa whoa, ok stop. One more time, start over for me."

Confused, JJ complied: "1, 2, 3, 6, 8, 9, 5."

Kohr stopped her once again: "OK. We're going to do this. I'm going to hold up my fingers, and you're going to tell me how many you see."

JJ: "What's going on…why is this hard?"

Kohr: "Just indulge me."

JJ starting to inwardly panic: "OK Go."

As Kohr holds up his fingers one at a time. Slowly adding a digit each time.

JJ: "1…2…3…4…5…6…7…8…9…10."

Kohr: "OK great."

JJ: "What's wrong with my brain?" She was starting to get glassy eyed and the possibilities that what was happening was long term…or permanent.

Kohr: "Shhh, it's alright, we'll figure it out, and we'll get through it okay? I need you to take this pen in your right hand…you are right handed?"

JJ: "Both actually."

Kohr: "Super, now I want to you take this and write on this, write me down one through ten."

JJ: "OK…"

She complies, slowly, but eventually successfully. It takes her about 3 times as long as normal. To her it felt almost like an algebra test.

JJ: "Why was that the hardest thing ever?"

Kohr: "What's 2+2?"

JJ: "3" "No, 5."

Kohr: "4"

JJ: "Damn."

Kohr: "Now write 3+3 on the paper and see if you can figure it out. No judging, you're safe here alright?"

JJ: "Yeah sure. Can I judge myself?"

Kohr: "No, your brain was just through a trauma. Relax and try it."

JJ writes 3+3 on the paper. Just writing the problem was difficult. She tried a couple of different ways to figure out the problem but the Doc said they weren't correct. So the only way she could see to do it was to mark little tally marks tallying III and III and counting all of them.

JJ: "6?"

Kohr: "That's it, great job! See you still have the ability, it's just different. I have to run a few more tests, but I think your problem is going to be abstract. Thinking the numbers in your head. You can visually see the problem on paper or in front of you, but when it comes to trying to figure it out in your head…you can't."

JJ: "So what does that MEAN? Is this permanent?! I can't pass the re-entrance field exam like this!"

Kohr: "Well, let me do this." He held up 7 random numbers and letters and asked her to read them back to him.

JJ: " 2"

Kohr: "Perfect, now memorize them…ok?"

JJ: "OK."

Kohr put the paper down: "OK again."

JJ: " 2?"

Kohr: "Perfect again. That's really good! You have no problem with retaining number and letter combinations you've seen. It looks like it might be just math, counting…things that you need to see in your head without having a picture to fall back on."

JJ: "Awesome. Soooo…"

Kohr: "That's all I've got for you right now unfortunately. But this let's me know where we need to test further, get a specialized therapist down here, and start working on rebuilding those pathways so you can regain full, to simple function of that part of your brain. Alright? Just another bump in the road. It might not be as bad as you think. I'll have a talk later with your superiors and see if they can make up a special re-entry test if needed, or put you into the field without that specific requirement."

JJ: "But to be a profiler, you need to be able to see ALL the angles! INCLUDING number patterns..or at least SIMPLE COUNTING AND MATH!"

She threw the pen and paper onto the foot of her bed and put her forehead into her right hand, clearly frustrated.

Dr. Kohr looked around, and handed her the food tray.

JJ: "What…"

Kohr: "Throw it."

JJ: "Seriously?"

Kohr: "Sure…gimme one second." He walked over to the open door and yelled out "Loud noises comin' atchya! No worries!"

JJ smiled and threw the tray at the wall. Then grabbed another random instrument and threw that as well. Making a loud clanging sound as it landed on the floor on top of the food tray. She yelled in anger as she threw.

Kohr: "Ya done?"

JJ: "No."

Kohr: "Yes. Your friends are in the waiting room with Henry and Will. Pull it together woman. I know you just got some crappy news, but you're ok, your alive, and you'll be healthy enough to go home in a couple of days."

JJ: "WHAT!?"

Kohr: "You heard me, as long as you can get around ok then I can release you outpatient."

JJ: "Oh thank god! I hate it here."

Kohr: "Doesn't everyone?"

JJ: "Not you apparently…"

Kohr: "After the last day or so…don't be too sure."

JJ: "Fair enough, hey, can you give me a few minutes before you send people back in? As much as you can stall?"

Kohr: "You got it. Do you want me to tell them, or do you want to?"

JJ: "It would probably be easier for you to explain, I still can't figure it out so…"

He nodded and closed the door. He didn't blame her for needing time to process. Her prognosis was not what he had hoped for her, but it could've been worse. He kept repeating it to himself.


	17. Chapter 17

CHAPTER 17

IN THE WAITING ROOM, 8 AM

Doris wouldn't have been surprised if Will wore a hole right into the carpet while he was pacing worriedly. All he said to her was a quick: "I hate these stupid tests.". She knew that what he really meant was: "I wish I knew that she was going to be ok."

Doris: "Hey, why don't you sit down sugar, your making me dizzy."

Will: "I can't, what if he finds something is wrong, she's already been through so much. I…she…" he sighed, looking down again and pacing. Arms folded across his chest.

Before he could even see them, he heard loud cheerful voices and laughing in the stairwell. The one laugh was unmistakable. It was his beautiful son.

Will ran over to the door of the stairs, all of the sudden NEEDING to hold his little boy, and hold him tight. Before he got to them they all burst through. And he literally saw ALL of them. Every single team member had met up at Garcia's not long after JJ had called and helped with getting Henry ready. They piled into a couple of SUVs, grabbed breakfast quickly and headed over immediately. They were ready to see how the heart of their little family was doing.

Garcia noticed Will's face and immediately handed over Henry to him.

Henry: "DADDY!"

Will: "Hey big guy! Are you ready to see Mama today!?"

Henry: "YEAH! She still have booboos?"

Will: "Yeah buddy, she'll have them for a little bit, but she'll get better soon, don't you worry!"

As Will said this, he realized for the first time that his wife might never be able to play soccer with her son the way that they used to love to do. She might never be an athlete again. If that happened, he didn't know how she would react. She had based her life around doing the right thing, being the perfect athlete, the perfect student…the perfect Mom. Not everything always worked out, but those few things she could control. He started tearing up as the emotions of the previous day and this morning were getting to him again, but stifled for Henry's sake.

Henry: "Dorits!"

Doris: "Hey dude! Did you have a fun sleepover? I heard you stayed at your Auntie's house?"

Henry: "PG IS FUN!"

Penelope leered at Will again.

Will: "Seriously, I have nothing to do with that! You already yelled at JJ!"

Garcia looked at him suspiciously: "Hmmm…ok…for now."

The team laughed.

Morgan: "So when can we see Goldilocks?"

Will: "I'm not sure, they've been in there for almost an hour doing 'cognitive testing'? Whatever it is, it doesn't sound from out here like it's pleasant for her."

Will had heard the painful grunts and screams coming from the other side of the doors. Not to mention a couple of interesting crashing sounds a couple of minutes prior. He would've ran straight in there, but Doris had called the inside Nurses Station and she informed him that they were forewarned of the crashing. This did nothing to set his mind at ease. Knowing his wife, this meant that she had gotten bad news and wanted to destroy things. He didn't blame her, but wished it wasn't true.

Reid: "How do you mean?"

Will: "From where we've been sitting…she sounds angry."

Rossi: "Well that's never good."

Hotch: "Let's wait until we get the facts first. What's this testing about? What are they testing for?"

Dr. Kohr walked in and heard the question: "I was testing her nerve and brain functionality now that the fever, brain and nerve swelling have subsided."

Will: "And? I know it's bad, but tell me how bad."

Kohr looked at him confused.

Will: "She's not exactly quiet when she's pissed."

Kohr made an understanding face and nodded in agreement: "There are definitely a couple of issues that she has reason to be upset about. I'll just go through and explain one at a time. She told me she'd rather me tell you because I can explain it better."

Garcia: "Tell us what?"

Morgan: "Spit it out already."

Kohr took a deep, almost frightened breath: "OK, first off, the things we knew going in. I got a chance to really test the nerve damage to her left leg and arm. Her leg has a 60% nerve paresis, which will almost definitely be able to be bumped up to 85% functionality, and maybe 100% best case with intensive therapy. Which she'll need YOU for." He nodded in Morgan's direction.

Morgan: "Boot camp, got it."

Kohr: "Her arm, it's a little more up in the air. Since she has the broken hand and must keep it immobilized for 6 to 8 weeks, we have to wait on the physical therapy. In injuries with nerves damage, the longer the wait is from initial injury to the start of physical therapy, the lower the chances of full return of functionality."

Reid: "In 81% of nerve damage cases where they delayed treatment, the patient only maxed out at about 40% marked improvement. It's even more rare when it's an outer extremity."

Rossi: "Reid!"

Will: "Shut up!"

Garcia started crying again. But quietly, almost to herself.

Will: "So is that why she was pissed?"

Kohr: "Unfortunately, no that's the pain you heard earlier. We had to test her abilities in the extremities. It's not the most pleasant feeling."

Will: "So what else is there? Oh no."

It clicked with Will that their must've been some other brain damage that they had not yet come across. His face fell.

Kohr could just look at his eyes and braced himself for the fallout: "OK well... In addition to her partial paresis, she's having some very specific cognitive abstract imaging and reasoning difficulties."

Reid: "Oh no."

They looked at him and got even more worried as he paled. Then whipped their heads back to the doctor for an explanation.

Kohr: "The good news is there is a small possibility that the issue is temporary. If not, then there is another small chance that she may be able to be rehabilitated and retrain her brain how to do some of the more basic functions."

Hotch: "BASIC functions? You're saying it's that serious?!"

Kohr: "From what we discussed, and I don't know anything about what you guys do, she is very concerned she both won't be able to pass the field rating exam. She also feels it will hinder her profiling performance. And in reading between the lines, I'm fairly certain she feels as though you guys will think less of her and her abilities as an agent."

Hotch: "She's one of the best agents we have? She literally got a very high profile promotion and then became a profiler so that she could come back to our team. There's nothing that could get us to let her go."

Kohr: "Well, I'm not saying what she's thinking is reasonable. She's probably projecting her own feelings of inadequacy onto the people she feels depend on her to be on her best game. SHE, herself, doesn't feel like she'll be enough for you guys. Either way, she will most definitely have difficultly passing any written exam at this time. We'll see how the therapy progresses."

Rossi: "So what EXACTLY is her issue, you said "Abstract Reasoning?" Something or other?"

Kohr: "Yes, only selective portions of her abstract visualization and reasoning have been affected. She can talk, and think, and picture images just fine. It's when she tried to conjure specific images and sequences that don't have a real world visual attached to them. Therein lies her issue."

Garcia: "So what does that mean?"

Reid: "Numbers. Numbers are abstract, unless written down, they don't have any sort of actual image attached to them. So, I think what Dr. Kohr is saying, is that she knows the number 3 exists, she can picture it written down, she can write it down…but ultimately it has no meaning to her from a sequential standpoint or in a problem solving capacity. Doctor, can she solve problems on paper or remember written sequences?"

Kohr: "She's fine with written sequences that she can see and then recall. Her written, abstract problem solving skills are existent, but VERY limited. I'm talking 3+3=6 type problems take her a while on paper. But, just in the time that we were testing, she already figured out a way to compensate for the smaller number problems with tallies. Unfortunately, that's not going to do much for her more difficult, everyday calculations."

Reid: "And how difficult was it for her to do the problem, in the way of her frustration threshold?"

Kohr: "She said, and I quote 'It feel like I'm doing calculus in my head'."

Reid: "Oh, so it's not too bad at least?"

The team, including the doctor as well all just looked at him and chuckled at the completely inappropriate situation.

Reid: "Is calculus one of those things that you guys CAN'T do…I assume?" He said all the sudden becoming less confidant.

Garcia: "It's okay sweety. You're going to be a huge help to JJ. She'll need a tutor!"

Reid: "I can do that! Though I'll need constant FBI backup and medics on stand by at all times. I can imagine she will be drawing her weapon on me more than once."

Everyone laughed at that. Of all people, they didn't expect Reid to be the one to joke around and diffuse the highly upsetting situation.

Will: "Well, judging by that crash I heard earlier, he's not too far off."

Kohr: "Yeeeeeaahhh I gave her permission for that. I figured she'd need to get at least a little bit of rage blackout time before seeing everyone. I'm going to go see if she's pulled herself together. I told her she had no choice and that you guys were all here. Annnnnnd looking at my watch I have successfully stalled for the requested 10 minutes. I'll be back."

Kohr walked back into the ICU.

Will: "Yeah ten minutes should be enough to reconcile that your life as you know it may be over. She's ridiculous. I'd kick everyone out for at least a week, and wallow, and drink for a while."

Garcia: "Well, she doesn't have that luxury. She has you guys. She feels she has to take care of her family and be her normal strong, beautiful, heroic self. And though she's an FBI agent by trade…"

Rossi cuts her off: "…She's a Mom first. She'll put it aside, for Henry."

Morgan: "I don't see what the big deal is, it's just math. I'm bad at math and they let me in the FBI."

Everybody started to chuckle, then of course Reid ruins it.

Reid: "Yeah, but not being able to do complicated, or even simple math without a calculator is one thing. Numbers having little or, no meaning unless visually in front of you is another. Imagine we are on a case, and there are five victims, JJ will have no idea what that means until she physically sees their files or their pictures and counts them one by one. Or, say we're in the field ready to move in on an Unsub or something, and we get information over the radio that there are 3 hostiles in the building. JJ will not be able to visualize how many hostiles that is unless someone literally holds up three fingers at her and gives her a second to count them and process. Unfortunately, she's right to be fearful. The FBI won't let her be out in the field in a dangerous situation without at least mastering visualizing numbers she hears, and also assigning value to numbers she sees easily."

Everybody was quiet for a few seconds but Henry.

Henry: "I see Mama now, Daddy?"

He turned his dad's face with his hand to look at his.

Henry: "Daddy, me want Mama. Everybody sad. I sad. I want Mama."

Will: "OK Buddy, we're gonna see Mama in just a second. As soon as the doctor comes back! K?"

Henry just sighed and started to cry, but he didn't make any noise or yell, so Will let him and just wiped his tears…not realizing he had started to cry himself. Half of the room had shed a tear at the revelation that JJ might not be joining them again. At least in the same respect as before. Sure she could work the cases with them, and go help them while they work out of town cases, but as it was, she would not be able to be out in her element, taking down criminals daily. They would take what they could get, there's no way they were losing her from the team all together.

Kohr came back in and told Will and Henry they could go back and see her. He said more could come back as well, but they decided to give the family some space before bombarding JJ with their varied, frayed emotions. The last thing they wanted was for her to break. They knew she wouldn't want that in front of her respected team. And she never would…not in front of the whole team at least.

A/N: Alright guys. There you have it. Here's decision time. I'm going to finish out the aftermath in this story. In rereading it, I realized it's actually not that long. THANKS!


	18. Chapter 18

CHAPTER 18

2 MONTHS LATER: PHYSICAL THERAPY

Morgan: "GO JJ, GO! One more! You're almost there! This is nothing! Just push through it. The pain isn't even there! Only your goal, finish it! All the way up, come on! How are those numbers coming!? Huh?! How's your counting!?"

He was trying to piss her off to get her to push through the pain of the leg curls they had been working on. She's been making great progress on her leg. It was at almost 85% already in 2 months. Dr. Kohr thought that there was no reason she couldn't get it back up to 100% within the normal 6 month time frame or less.

Morgan: "All the way! All the way! Almost! Alright you got it, you're done! Relax, JJ! You did it!"

JJ: "Ahh!" She cried out in pain as she let the leg curl machine fall and rested for a few minutes. She was beet red, sweaty and breathing deep, but finally without any chest pain. It had taken over a month to go away fully, but she could workout harder now in physical therapy without the added breathing difficulty.

JJ looked down at the floor, catching her breath, grabbing tightly with her right hand onto the shoulder of Morgan's shirt. Most times if she gripped something, which was usually him, she could get through the pain radiating up her entire left leg, hip and through most of her back. Most times. On occasion she had been known to accidentally push herself too far and just scream and cry for a few minutes until she either relaxed, or the doctor came and medicated her. JJ would of course get scolded each time. She was supposed to let the therapist and Morgan know if the pain got to be too much, and stop to rest, but she never did.

Her left hand, as usual, tucked up diagonally in front of her chest. She rarely moved it from there, it was almost like a security compulsion now, protecting her hand and her chest. Also she didn't want everyone to see that she couldn't fully straighten her arm yet. Obviously her friends and family knew, and her therapists, but in the general public, she just keeps it up in front of her. Until later today she had the cast on it as an excuse, she could say "Oh it's broken, I need to keep it up." Something stupid along those lines. But she was about to lose her safety net.

After bout 5 minutes of rest, and lots of water, JJ let go of Morgan's shoulder and sat back up, a few tears had fallen down her cheeks from the effort. She took one more deep breath.

JJ: "Again, I can do a five more." Her shaky voice none too convincing, but she tried to shake it off.

Morgan wiped the tears from her cheeks with his thumbs and looked at her face for a few seconds. She looked right back into his eyes with her ice blue, determined eyes, the right of which now had a contact lens. They didn't realize at first, but after she was still getting headaches the second week after the incident they gave her an eye test. Her right eye had lost a significant enough amount of vision to be making her a little dizzy with strain headaches.

Morgan was starting to be able to tell when she was past her threshold. He was a profiler after all. But, unfortunately for both of them, she gave him the same scary focused, straight in the eye look every time. He'd seen military personnel and huge, inner city cops give him the same look. For some reason, this fairly small, blonde girl was the only one who had ever successfully stared him down. She didn't even mean to. She literally wasn't even thinking about him. Every time JJ gave him that look, every day, it was because she was holding back screams of extreme pain and usually massive frustration. She would stare at him like a professional weightlifter after a dead lift. Blood pressure sky high and adrenaline fueled.

Morgan: "Yeeeaahhhh" He continued to search her eyes for tells. "I think we're gonna call it a day on this one. You're off the hook til tomorrow afternoon Tiny Hulk. You have a long day ahead of you with that cast and tests and stuff. Relax."

JJ didn't want to think about that, she wasn't ready. If she had to "accidentally" hurt herself to get out of it for another day…she was actually considering it. She would take the leg pain, that she knew well by now, and the scolding over the inevitable failure that she knew would be her arm.

JJ: "No, I can do this! I can do another rep! Come on Derek, you KNOW I can!"

'Shit', she thought, she sounded too zealous. That had been her only tell in the past. She gave herself away.

Morgan: "HA! I KNEW IT! No way Mama J! You're absolutely done for the day."

He knew that plea. He also knew if he called her out on it there would be hell to pay. He was prepared just to let it happen. Instead, she looked away from his eyes, to the side, and then down, brought her eyes back up to his and completely broke down.

JJ: "I can't, they can't do it today! I'm not ready! It's not going to be better, it's not gonna get better! GOD! Why should I even BOTHER! I'm canceling the appointment, I'm going home, I have to see Henry. I'm not ready…" She sobbed all the way through until she couldn't talk anymore and Morgan just grabbed her and bear hugged her until she had calmed down enough to talk.

Morgan: "You listen to me, after everything you've been through these past 2 months. After everything you've gone through with your lungs, and your leg, and your stupid math problems, THIS is what's going to break you? You're getting your damned cast off? I know it's scary, and I know what they say about percentages, and chances or whatever, but you're the strongest person I know. I couldn't do what you do on a daily basis, let alone with the grace and beauty that you do it with. You can do anything, I've seen it! I mean, you survived the unsurvivable! WITH NINJA-LIKE SPEED! And made jokes! You were making us laugh, and you couldn't even breath, let alone stand up. Now look at you. A barely noticeable limp, you still have sharpshooter status according to the FBI, and with ONE HAND! Imagine when you get that other arm together. Huh? You just have to be the strong, amazing woman we all love, and get to work!"

JJ looked up at the ceiling to try and stop crying. Sniffed. Looked back down at the ground and pulled herself together. Looking back into his eyes she nodded.

JJ: "I'm cool. Sorry. It happens. More than you think haha. I'm not Superwoman, but usually I save this for nights at home with Will. Poor guy probably thinks I'm a basket case." She was calming down and sniffling. She chuckled a little.

Morgan: "What?"

JJ: "I've been breaking down almost every night at home after therapy and my tutoring sessions. But it took me 2 months to do it in front of you during the ACTUAL pain." She chuckled again.

Morgan: "I don't understand. I'm a dude. Spell it out."

JJ: "Well, it either means I AM Superwoman, or you're right, and I'm just having a weak moment, like a 'dude'."

Morgan: "Ha ha, very funny. I vote Superwoman."

JJ: "Yeah, let's go with that. Can you make sure to tell Will though, that I never breakdown in therapy? I think I freak out so much at home he doesn't believe I can act like a normal human during the day. I need witnesses."

Morgan let out a quiet laugh at that: "Yes, I will tell him about the Superwoman thing."

JJ: "My leg hurts."

Morgan: "I know, let's get you over to your bed."

Though JJ goes home every afternoon after therapy, Dr. Kohr set up a semi-permanent room for her across the hall from the physical therapy room so that she could rest for a while, and let the pain subside directly following sessions. Her pain was manageable all other times of the day, but still too much for her to get right up and start walking around after therapy.

Morgan crouched into his normal position, under her left arm, as she wrapped her casted hand around his neck for a brace. He wanted to carry her back every day in the beginning, but she hasn't let him do that since the second week. The only time he was allowed was if she actually hurt herself and couldn't even move, let alone walk.

Morgan: "You ready?"

JJ took a deep breath.

Morgan: "Ready, set, UP!"

JJ: "Agghhh!" JJ grunted in pain as she was lifted into a standing position, not yet letting her leg touch the floor. They rested like that for a minute while she let the initial pain subside. He went to go and she stopped him, she needed another minute. She had overdone it today, he was right.

The first time they did this Morgan had said the standard 'One, two, three.' Then lifted. That was the only time he'd ever make that mistake. She wasn't prepared when he lifted her due to her numbers situation, and he had basically pulled the entire side of her body that was in excruciating pain up without her bracing her right side first. She had to take the entire next day off therapy. JJ obviously didn't blame him, but he felt horrible and they immediately came up with new terminology. Morgan still hadn't grasped the magnitude of her cognitive disability. As they stood here now after her confession, he wondered if she went home that night and broke down about it to Will. He wouldn't blame her, he had heard her screams.

Morgan: "I was right wasn't I!? HA! I knew it. Liar."

JJ just looked at the floor, her face all flushed and red again with pain. Taking shaky, deep breaths between very clear winces.

JJ: "Shhhhhh. MMM mmm." She shook her head 'No' not even looking at him. Not to say he wasn't right, but more to say 'Shut up, I'm not in the mood to talk.'

Morgan understood and just waited til she indicated she was ready. As they moved slowly down the hall, the ACTUAL physical therapist, who usually just got them started and then watched to make sure she didn't over do it, stared at the tiny girl walking slowly. He shook his head not understanding why they would just let them wheel her out or let Morgan carry her. Stubborn, but strong. Too much pride I guess. These FBI agents were gonna be the death of him.


	19. Chapter 19

CHAPTER 19

ANOTHER 2 MONTHS LATER

A stapler goes whizzing by Reid's head, as he casually moves to the left and it hits the wall behind him. It puts a small hole in the drywall and shatters to pieces on the floor. Reid was expecting it. It was practice test day. Something flies and breaks every Thursday. They started put cheap objects on the table purposefully so she'd stop breaking expensive things and having to pay for them, but she specifically seeks out the nice stuff.

Reid: "Hey at least you threw it with your left arm this time."

He had become even more cheeky in his sessions with JJ three times a week. Ironically, he found if he used a mocking or sarcastic tone with her it had one of two desired affects. JJ would either get angry and grow more determined to prove him wrong, sometimes making progress. Or, she would be sarcastic back, and they would laugh. This let her blow off some steam, then refocus her energies with lower frustration.

JJ: "Small favors."

Reid: "That's actually a big deal, you're unconsciously starting to use your damaged hand and arm again in everyday situations. This is a sign that at least part of your brain is starting to heal and reset it's neuropathways to perform mundane tasks."

JJ: "Sooo…yeyy? I threw a stapler?"

Reid: "Pretty much. The stapler never had a chance anyway, but you're definitely still making progress in physical therapy."

JJ: "Oh! Good for me then! Bad for the stapler. Very bad for this test's score."

Reid: "Let me take a look, you were doing better earlier this week with arithmetic, your time has basically cut in half from 4 months ago with simple problems on paper."

JJ: "I think it's mainly me memorizing pictures from repetitively seeing them. For some reason I still can't see them as like…numbers…more like picture representations of tally marks in my head."

Reid: "Well that's great though, your brain is learning to compensate for it's disability by thinking of the abstract number, and automatically changing it to a picture that makes sense to you."

JJ: "Wooo." She said sarcastically.

JJ: "Soooo…I still can't read problems over ten, have significant problems with double digits, haven't even attempted multiplication or division, I can't count or use numbers properly out loud, can't figure out basic sequences, or properly assigned value or sequence to numbers spoken to me out loud…right?"

Reid: "Well…"

JJ: "So I'm screwed. It's been 4 months and all I've been able to do is elaborate on the stuff that I already COULD do to begin with…and BADLY…AND SLOWLY!"

Reid: "OK, I can see your frustrated today, do you wanna just let it go for the day?"

JJ: "TODAY!? I'm frustrated CONSTANTLY! My FIVE YEAR OLD son is in class at school right now in FIRST grade and HE can count to 50!"

Reid: "That's because he's smart! Like his Mom!"

JJ stopped, that shut her up. She didn't know how to respond in rant form to that statement.

Reid: "JJ, you're smart, you're capable, you're strong. You always have been, and so is Henry. Just because you are having this one stupid problem, that yes, you may NEVER be able to compensate for, doesn't mean you're not still one of the brightest people I know!"

JJ: "Besides you."

Reid: "Besides me, of course."

JJ laughed. She liked this new, kind of playful side of Reid. She knew he was funny, but now feels like he would be a great teacher if he could let go of his anxieties.

Reid continued, even though he'd already succeeded in making her feel better. He needed to get some of this off his chest, again, and it seemed like she needed to hear it…AGAIN.

Reid: "Henry is everything you are! When you look at him, and you see him learning, and accomplishing new things? He gets that from YOU! Look at him and see yourself, everyone else around you does. This thing, that you have, this stupid mental block, it was done TO you! It's not something you can help, or that you caused! And it DOESN'T make you stupid, or weak, or fragile! So stop being STUBBORN and accept that you're amazing!"

JJ: "Whoa."

Reid: "I know, ranted. Well YOU were ranting and it made ME want to rant. Because believe it or not, I'm frustrated too! I can't fix my best friend! Do you know what it feels like to not be able to make your family stop hurting?"

JJ just stared at him like 'Are you serious?'.

Reid: "Of course you know, but still. I'M ANGRY TOO!"

JJ handed him a box of paper clips which he promptly took and threw against the wall, scattering them everywhere.

They both quietly sighed and got up from their chairs and picked them up all up one by one.

Once they were all collected and placed back on the desk, Reid just made a scrunched up face.

JJ: "What?"

Reid: "Is this how Morgan feels everyday?"

JJ: "Oh no, Morgan gets it much worse. You get yelling, he has to deal with pain. You don't like not being able to fix my brain? He has to be the one who puts me in excruciating pain every day for two hours…then he gets the fun job of helping me walk back to my room. Super fun. OH! He also gets to see me all veiny and sweaty and gross."

Reid: "Right. Yeah he wins." He chuckled at himself

JJ: "I WIN."

Reid: "You win the pity contest. Now. What do you wanna do? About your head?"

JJ: "Good question." She lets out a slow sigh. "OK. Let's say, for shits and giggles, that I were to hold up mostly on the other stuff I can't do at all, and just concentrated on refining the stuff I can. What are the statistics that I'd get any better than I've already gotten. And what are the chances that I'll just plateau?"

Reid: "I'd say pretty crappy in all aspects. Not that I'm saying you won't get any better. I'm saying the chances of you getting a LOT better, are a LOT slim. And the chances of you learning any of the new stuff is almost non-existent at this point, having made no progress after four months."

JJ: "So what are our options?"

Reid: "Well, I'd have to consult your neurologist…"

JJ: "You ARE my neurologist at this point, Spence. What do YOU think my options are?"

Reid: "OK, Well.. The amount of daily frustration and stress you amass from these sessions and the practice exercises I give you for home is having relatively the opposite effect of helping. I believe the damages incurred to certain aspects of your brain will prohibit you from gaining any significant advances in your abstract visual cognitive functionality through numbers. And I also believe that if any progress is to be made, it will be naturally, without the use of intensive therapy and force."

JJ: "So…real words?"

Reid: "Basically JJ, JUST in my opinion…and I'd like to stress that this is just based on statistical probability…If it's gonna come to you eventually, it's gonna come to you. If it's not, then not it's not. If therapy hasn't helped yet, it won't. There's always a chance you might make progress over the years, and that your brain will adapt and find new ways to figure certain things out. But there's no telling what those things will be, if anything."

JJ: "So you're saying give up and just let it be?"

Reid: "I'd say, as your friend and not your doctor…"

JJ: "Ok, I get that part."

Reid: "Sorry, I'd say that working too hard at it is doing more harm than good to your emotional state, and you should concentrate on resting at home for your physical therapy."

JJ: "Ok. Today is over. I'm done. Let me think on this for a little bit and I'll call you later alright?"

Reid: "Ok… JJ I'm sorry."

JJ: "It's ok, it's almost a relief to finally know. Now I can figure out where to go from here."

Reid: "Are you sure you don't want company, to bounce ideas off of? Or just, talk about it? It's a pretty big blow."

JJ: "I'm good for now. As I said…I'll call you if I need you Spence. Thanks for everything, I know it's been hard. And I've been more than difficult. I'm used to being the perfect student, this was all just very frustrating."

Reid: "I understand, obviously."

JJ: "I'll see ya, Spence. Go have fun, get some lunch with a pretty girl."

Reid: "The only pretty girl I ever have lunch with is you."

JJ: "Cute."

Reid: "I'm learning from Morgan. He is the master."

JJ: "God help us all."

Reid: "See ya later."

They both walked out of the Cognitive Therapy room separate ways; him to the exit, and her to her room down the hall to change for physical therapy in an hour.

As she stepped into her room, she closed the door slowly and quietly. Turned around and leaned against the door. She slowly sank to the floor in the dark, letting herself finally process what Reid had said. She took a shaky breath and put her forehead in her hands. Then leaned back and lightly banged her head against the door in frustration three times before just sitting motionless and silent. She sat like this until her phone alarm went off to tell her therapy was supposed to be starting. She leaned over to her right side and pushed herself up with her right arm and leg, grabbing onto the door handle with her right hand to pull herself up. It takes her a little longer to get up these days. Brushing herself off, she turned the light on, grabbed her work out clothes, and headed to the bathroom to get changed. This also takes her longer than it used to.

When JJ got out of the bathroom dressed, Morgan was standing in her room with his arms crossed waiting for her to come out. She wasn't even startled. His imposing presence doesn't scare her anymore.

Morgan: "What happened?"

JJ: "I don't wanna talk about it."

She tried to walk towards the door towards therapy, but there was no getting by him.

Morgan: "Ah Ah Ah. What. Happened. You're only late for physical therapy when you have a bad session with Reid."

JJ: "I ALWAYS have a bad session with Reid."

Morgan: "Yeah but your not ALWAYS late. Only when you're really worked up. What's up?"

JJ sighed, just wanting it to be over: "He told me the truth."

Morgan: "Which was?"

JJ: "Which was what I already knew and I know he knew weeks ago."

Morgan: "Which. Was?"

JJ: "Therapy isn't helping. He said if anything it's hurting me more than it's helping actually. It's more stress and frustration than it's worth."

Morgan: "And?"

JJ: "And…he doesn't think…that it's going to get much better. Especially using therapy."

Morgan: "Oh."

JJ: "Yeah, can we now stop talking about it?"

Morgan: "Well, what are you gonna do?" He ignored her plea.

JJ: "I don't know yet. I haven't even talked to the doctor about it yet."

Morgan: "But I think you've known what you were going to do for a while."

JJ: "I hate working with profilers."

Morgan: "You ARE a profiler."

JJ: "I WAS a profiler."

Morgan: "You still ARE one! You always WILL be!"

JJ: "Not now! Not after this. If this ends, if this therapy is useless…I'm never returning to what I was. I don't even know if they'll let me even be a consultant for you guys! I might just lose me job all together!"

Morgan: "No, Hotch will never let that happen! They can't discriminate against you because you're mentally impaired!"

JJ: "HEY! WORDS!"

Morgan: "I'm sorry JJ, but you are! And there's nothing wrong with it! And there's nothing wrong with YOU! And they can't just kick you out of a job that you're great at because of it! Just say you can't pass the field rating test, OK, so you don't come raid houses with us! You can still do every other step of the job fine, and if we need to learn to compensate a little, I'm sure we can figure that out. Especially after everything you've done, killing yourself to be in top shape to get back! So, no way! You're not giving up on us, or your job! Just because you wanna stop cognitive therapy doesn't mean you have to give up on everything else!"

JJ: "Fine! Jesus! I didn't say I was, I was just…"

Morgan: "What!? Feeling sorry for yourself? Whatever. You had a dude moment, it happens. How about you just destroy physical therapy today instead and accomplish something useful. As opposed to sitting here in the dark wallowing…don't think I don't know about that!"

JJ: "You're a dick!"

Morgan: "You love me."

JJ: "UGHHH!"

She pushed past him with her left arm and opened the door…with her left arm and limped quickly and angrily down to physical therapy.

Morgan just stayed back a second watching and laughing.

Morgan: "I love doing that."

He knew that making her mad about cognitive therapy would always make for a better PT day. He always feels bad while he's doing it, but never fails to be satisfied by the outcome.


	20. Chapter 20

CHAPTER 20

THE NEXT WEEK

STRAUSS' OFFICE

JJ and Dr. Kohr sat, while Hotch, Morgan, and Reid stood behind them. All across the desk from a seriously miserable looking Strauss. She had finished reading JJ's updated report about her rehabilitation. Thus far she did NOT look pleased.

In the report read everything that JJ had experience up until that point, physical, mental, and emotional. Also results of all tests, including the field ready test, which JJ had not passed, and the sharpshooter test, which JJ passed with flying colors. Everyone looking at Erin knew that she was always pretty stern, and that she had a history of undermining JJ's position at the BAU. After all, she had allowed her to be taken from the team a few years ago and sent to the State Department. The State Department, who incidentally, had surprisingly not expressed interest in getting JJ back after failing the field ready test. This surprised everyone because they were so obsessed with getting her in the first place, at a job that did not require field readiness or math. Why wouldn't they want her back immediately if she can't perform her full duties as profiler?

The report read that JJ's leg after over 4 months of therapy was at over 85% functionality, but had plateaued since the beginning of the 3rd month, not seeing much progress since. She could get around fairly easily, as long as there weren't too many stairs, a long incline, and as long as she rested every 10 minutes or so. Her arm and hand had only started therapy about 2 months prior, it had started at about 50%. In that time she had regained up to 70% nerve functionality, and almost full strength. She could even write…badly. She could hold but not fire a gun with her hand. And she could drive again, which for JJ was extremely exciting since she was sure Morgan, and Will were sick of carting her back and forth, to and from the hospital everyday. Plus, she got handicapped parking, which made her both sad and excited all at the same time.

Unfortunately, the report also read that the official decision to cease cognitive therapy for her impairment had been made unanimously by JJ, Dr. Kohr, and Reid, respectively. Dr. Kohr agreed that the stress was doing more harm than good at the point. Also, there was no use practicing on a page doing what a calculator can do, unless it was going to help with the other disabilities. Which had become clear that it wasn't. Dr. Kohr also agreed with the "If it is going to happen it will happen" approach.

What the group had previously failed to realize, was that in the years JJ and Strauss had worked together, though very different personalities and work ethics, Strauss had come to greatly respect and care for JJ as a member of her Department. They only reason Strauss had allowed her to be taken away from the BAU in the first place, was because she knew that JJ would hate it at the State Department, and push herself to take the classes and become a profiler. She had previously been assured in her deal with the Secretary, that if JJ became a profiler, she would be more valuable at the BAU than sitting behind a desk at the Pentagon. Strauss knew that JJ was the heart of this team, and she knew they would move heaven and Earth to figure out a way to stick together. It just didn't work without her. Even in the 4 months since she had been out of work, the BAU had caught 20% less criminals then the previous 4 months before that. Moral was low with her gone, and everyone was in constant concern for JJ's status as a member of the team.

What the group also didn't know, is that Strauss had been following JJ's progress closely, and confidentially with Dr. Kohr. Making certain she was kept aware of every progression and set back. She was literally, just waiting until she and Dr. Kohr thought she was ready to come back. Even in a limited capacity while she continued therapy.

When Strauss got the word that they had decided to cease the cognitive therapy, and read the report, she decided it was time to ascertain JJ's cognitive abilities at that time as a permanent handicap, and figure out the best course of action for her future. She went through all of the profiler duties at length with Dr. Kohr in person, and on the phone for a few days, while trying to find the best fit in the Department for JJ's new range of abilities. She also took into consideration the team's reaction, as well as JJ's physical and emotional wellbeing. Weighing the risks of her being on the team and the emotional detriment it would cause if she wasn't was the most difficult part of this all. Her choice in the end was clear.

Strauss: "Jennifer, I've gone over your full medical evaluation, and also reviewed all of your post-attack tests covering the 4 months or so you've been away."

JJ: "Yes, ma'am."

Strauss: "I'll ask you to please wait until I'm finished."

JJ blushed; "Sorry ma'am."

Strauss: "As I said, I've gone over your medical records and am fully apprised of your current, and probable future, and permanent conditions. I would like state that everyone in the Department is very happy that you came through all of this relatively in tact, with minimal permanent damage caused. We've missed you around here Jennifer."

JJ looked impressed at the attempt of graciousness for her usually cold superior. But, she was thankful for the sentiment, sure she was going to be put at a desk for the rest of her life. It was at least nice to hear that they cared. Kohr just glanced to the side and smirked at JJ's face.

Strauss: "That being said, I've given this a lot of thought. And I've decided that as long as you feel you're ready, we'd to have you back on your BAU team picking up where you left off as a profiler…but NOT field rated. I'm not a miracle worker Ms. Jareau."

JJ and the rest of the team besides Kohr were shocked, mouths agape.

JJ: "What!? But I…WHAT!?"

Strauss: "I asked you to please refrain until I'm finished, then you can make your final decision about the offer."

JJ just heard the other shoe drop…there was some crazy catch. She shut up.

Strauss: "Thank you. The obvious issue is your safety, and also the safety of your team members. We can't have you in the field on raids, which is a pity considering your shooting score. Though it seems you've already proven in the field that you were an excellent shot 4 months ago. Due to the unique nature of this dilemma, I've reached out to the State Department in conjunction with the Quantico Police Department to grant special permissions for a position to be created within the QPD. The officer, or Detective, will have full BAU access, and accompany the team on out of town cases, doubling for you on raids and they are to be at all meetings necessary for full involvement on the case. The QPD is expecting a transfer request for the position by next week. It's not a public posting due to special security circumstances and the choice of qualified personnel will be made solely by the team leader and Ms. Jareau."

JJ swung around a confused look at Hotch, still wearing her shocked expression. "But…" Hotch cleared his throat, and smirked.

Strauss, louder: "IN ADDITION (JJ whipped back around professionally), in addition, Dr. Kohr and I have had a talk with the hospital administrators about releasing a nurse at the hospital to come along on out of town cases as needed. The position, also privately posted due to special FBI security reasons, will include any care the must be provided towards you, or any other team member for that matter, while on cases, and also part of the responsibilities will include the possibility of part-time professional child care. Should that be necessary for any reason, for any member of the team. This position will be filled in conjunction with myself, Dr. Kohr, who happens to be on the hospital Board of Directors, and also any parents of any child that may or may not be involved. Agent Morgan will be continuing your physical therapy on the road if necessary."

She paused, not finished, but also knowing at that point JJ would probably say SOMETHING against her wishes. She was right…

JJ: "What?"

Strauss cleared her throat: "Shhh."

JJ: "sorry."

Strauss: "Agent Morgan is to continue your physical therapy under the nurse's supervision as I've been told it's getting less likely with the strength you've developed that you'll be able to push yourself too hard and injure yourself…AGAIN."

JJ: "Are you guys?…" She looked around at everyone as if this might be a big joke. And looking at everyone's face, she finally got past the shock and realized, that it was 50% serious and 50% a joke. They all knew before she got there.

Strauss: "Jennifer, are you going to shut up or would you like me to change my mind about you?"

JJ made a zipping her lips and throwing away the key motion.

Strauss: "Ok then" Addressing the other team members and Kohr. "As you boys already know, what Jennifer is thinking right now is, 'But what about school!', blah blah blah. She also probably thinking, 'I hate you guys.' Except for me of course, whom she greatly respects and shall forever worship."

Strauss kept a straight face this entire time, even longer than Hotch was able to.

Strauss: "We figured IF, and I say IF! There will be any children traveling with the frequently out of town team, he will need a tutor. So, through no extra charge to the Bureau, we had a volunteer on the team go to school and receive a teaching certificate…in shockingly record time. Although technically to be homeschooled, the teacher or tutor doesn't need a certificate. To be fair…"

Strauss eyeballs Reid, followed by JJ, who was trying and failing to contain a huge grin.

Strauss: "So…last but not least, your Supervisory Agent Hotchner, your nurse, and your police counterpart, who sidenote is in no way getting paid by or is supervised by the BAU and works for the QPD and the State Department jointly therefore fraternization rules do not apply, WILL have all final say, after ONLY discussing it in length with you first, what duties you should and shouldn't perform while out on cases. Their say only applies to the field and outside of secure areas, and in no way are to hinder whether you take a case and how you work any other part of said case. I would also like it to remain clear that all funding for any extra care or personnel needed is NOT being funded by the FBI, but by the State Department, the QPD, and the hospital. IS ALL OF THIS CLEAR AGENT JAREAU?!"

There was a pause

Strauss: "Now I'm finished…"

JJ: "OH! Sorry, yes ma'am very clear! I won't let you down! And THANK YOU!"

Strauss: "What can I say we like you with the FBI, you make us look good."

She said this with a completely straight face, save for a little smirk she just couldn't keep in. She covered by pulling her glasses on and looking down at some random paper on her desk. She looked up again, straight faced and miserable looking as ever.

Strauss: "Well…you're all dismissed. JJ, you start whenever Dr. Kohr says you start."

JJ wanted to kiss her, or maybe not, but hug her or something. All she could do was wipe away a couple of tears she didn't realize had fallen and mouth 'Thank you' again.

Strauss gave a her smile and nodded at her. Then she again nodded towards the door the Morgan was opening, as JJ turned around Garcia, Will, Henry, Blake and Anderson were all standing outside the door clapping and cheering. Henry particularly loved the cheering part. Garcia was laughing and had a tablet in her hand, she faced it towards JJ, and JJ saw the back for her own head and the whole team in Strauss' office. Strauss had secretly worked with Garcia to have her laptop on the desk Skype the whole thing to everyone outside. They were cracking up as JJ turned beet red again and yelled at everyone and cried happy tears again.

JJ: "You guys SUCK!"

Garcia: "Oh the whole thing is recorded sweety, I'm watching it every night before I go to bed, and after my Friends DVDs."

JJ: "I HATE ALL OF YOU, AND I'M GOING BACK TO THE STATE DEPARTMENT!" She joked.

Strauss from behind her yelled: "Oh they won't take you back! You're over qualified! I've made sure of that, haha."

They were all actually shocked by this confession, some putting together faster than others Strauss' master plan from a couple of years back. Well, she was the Head of the Department for a reason!

THE END...

A/N: I know to aftermath stuff may have gotten a bit tedious, but i wanted her to have a happy ending and it all just came tumbling out when I wrote this last year. I also know it's a bit ridiculous, but I couldn't resist having this funny Strauss scene in here...of course I didn't know a the time what would happen and what ad happened to JJ at the State Department...sad face. I hope you enjoyed it, thanks for reading, you guys were AWESOME! Makes me want to start writing again. Maybe lol.

JG


End file.
